My beloved friend,
I have so many things to say to you. I'll simply attempt to say as much as i possibly can. I'm so sorry to hear about your zemed, and i can only imagine what it must have been like to hear about it, and what it must have felt to think of the never sent splenda packet. Oh mitisha, i want to tell you how much i love you for being able to write so well and in ways that i can almost hear you through your writing. I'm not kidding this gift of yours shall not go to waste and i'm certain that it won't. I can almost hear you in it and even within the sadness, i smile imagining how you would pronounce every word. All this to say, i love reading you!
Mitisha, active love - with these simple words come so many emotions, i choke. It hits me do deep that i may even consider a bit about what exactly i'm saying while i'm typing. I can't imagine what your zemed must have endured. We are constantly failing to realize how much the emotional part of ourselves needs, just as much as the physical. I think for me the love being "active" is the issue. Sometimes it becomes issue enough for me to question even my ability to love. Remember that doctor Dostoevsky mentioned, who loved humanity but hated the individual? In a somewhat related... but yet again unrelated way... - i love humanity - Alhamdulilah - i love people and that has been a blessing in my life, and i love individuals also, but i wonder so often if these individuals know it, or even understand it. I lack that ability to show them constantly that i do in fact love them even though it may be behind my laughs, my jocks, my 'easy goingness', my 'i don't' mentality....
Mitiye, my work this summer has been a blessing. It has thought me in a much deeper level what it means to smile at a person, what it means to give another person the time to hear what they had to say, to show them they you care and that they matter as an individual. Oh my love, what a smile does! what being real means? What a wonderful feeling to be unselfish, no matter how seldom that feeling comes. The other day i had this idea of writing all the people i love a letter to show them what they mean to me. Of course i would never go through such a thing - abeso enen abedech belew amanuel yelekugnal. Even though i thought of all the smiles it would put on so many people's faces, i refrained hoping that they somehow new.
But, there is one thing i want to say - one thing that we both need to work on is our chelegnanet. Agu always use to warn me - yet yedersal yalut zaf kebele koretew honesh endatekeri. These very small things we do end up meaning the world to the other person on the receiving end. I've caught myself so many times missing opportunities, so many of them. I think this should be something we should keep in mind, but moments like these do come - where it really does become too late to do what we could have done, to say what could have meant the world to someone.
I'm learning in so many levels how hard life can be. Sometimes the way to deal with it is to embrace this very fact. Do the best you can do and them have the ability to to let go. I just finished the book by Ayan Hirsi Ali - i loved it. She did a great job. But you know what was so wonderful. I disagreed with most of her beliefs and ideas. I believe one of her aims in writing this book, and i think one of her aims of her career is to make Muslims question their beliefs and possibly "liberate" them from that very belief system. Mitiye, i finished that book with even an even stronger understanding of why it was that i was a Muslim. I was proud of myself for having matured enough to read such a book and not having responded in an emotional manner, because she was attacking the very idea that my being rests on. I somehow understood where she was coming from, but, for me, her arguments where not strong enough for me to even begin to question my beliefs. She simplified something which was much more complex. For the sake of bringing out a coherent argument, the answers to the questions she raised turned out to be too general to even begin to actually convince me of what she had to say. She raised great questions, she is a strong woman, to say the least, but there were many instances where i thought she had reduced a lot of what she thought to be Islam to her own personal experiences. I can easily get to a different conclusion by using different examples of whatever positive experiences I’ve had as a Muslim. But God help her, especially coming from a culture such as hers... how do you cut of your entire family and go out into the world on your own? Can you believe the guts you need to have? Try to imagine it for a second. I just pray that it would be worth it. Ya Allah, how about all the beating she and her sister endured from their mother? Can you imagine what it would be like if this mother was able to write a book of her own?... Becha...
As you know my summer in Michigan is coming to an end, and i have to say i'm excited to be starting school in a couple weeks. To be in my dorm and have time to myself and think... oh and i'm so looking forward to our Sunday brunch. Please Nafi'n astenkekiat to not abandon me on those mornings, at least not too often. Mitisha, i am no where near to being done with everything that i have to say, but i believe i need to stop right about now. I still have a couple things, especially today had been a very thought provoking day and i wanted to share most of them with you. I don't think i've done a good job of replying to your blogs but i'll do that in my next couple of blogs. For now i'm simply typing as thoughts flow in my head... i'll stop now and tell you that i love you and thank you for the millions time for being the person who understands my very heartbeat. I love you.
Akbarish,
Rihana
P.S while i was typing about active love to you Tony called me... you know what he said? - "Just wanted to tell you i love you" - my heart melted.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Monday, July 28, 2008
Feker to Rihana: A packet of 'Splenda'
My dearest darlin,
Please be warned that this post might not be the most positive of my letters to you. This weekend, I called home to allay their fears of my apartmentless situation. Even with my uncle, I know thy won't cease to fuss. So I was talking with my dad about this and that until he drops the news; a close zemed of ours had died. The news? not so shocking. My reaction? Most definitely! You know the me that never cries infront of people? I think my pillows have seen more tears than any human being. Well, when he dropped the bomb, I cried like a child. I really don't know what got into me ... it was bizzare.
So this zemed of mine had diabetes. She's had it for as long as I can remember. I remember us all kids, cousins and yezemed lijoch all congregating at her place on Saturdays. It is one of my most treasured memories from childhood. So it would be me, cousins in MD, and some others from back home ... very young ... saturday late afternoon sessions while our dads drank beer and did their 'ikub' thing. I remember liking her very much because she was always warm and kind to us kids. But I always noticed that she was a shadow of everyone else, by everyone i mean her brothers and sisters. You see, she has this older sister who is much more outgoing ... you know ... what you and I would refer to as 'keltafa'. This one, however nice, was just ... nice and chewa while the other one was exciting, talkative, says what she wants to say to whoever and for us kids she was the cool one.
When my parents were here, they told me that she had taken a turn for the worse. Mitish, I don't know how to explain it but ... beka ... how do you say it? anjete telawese. So I told them that I would buy her a packet of "splenda" for them to take to her. In the end darlin, yesew lij mecheresha ihew newina, I ended up not doing it and they went home empty handed. The part that hurts mitish, is when I proposed to send her the packet, I was sure it wouldn't do her any lasting good. But I wanted her to know she was ... thought of? loved even? And because I have this nonchalance disease deep within me, I neglected to do that one simple thing which would have brought a smile to her face.
Mitiye, a good friend once asked me, while I was going on and on about how awful it is to be UNable to love, "What about not being loved? I hate not being loved". Mitiye, that's exactly what entered my mind when my dad told me the news. I asked him if I should call the older sister and he "I don't think that's necessary. She's not making a big deal of it". Wow. so so cold. Mitiye, Doestovsky? Love? I have a sneaking suspicion her death was caused by diabetes just as much by lack of love. Mitiye, I really do believe that. And it makes it worse doesn't it? Ay darlin, all this to say we shan't forget our lessons on active love, however circumstances might force us to. To love or not to love? There shouldn't even be a choice.
Wedishalew.
Your disconcerted friend.
Please be warned that this post might not be the most positive of my letters to you. This weekend, I called home to allay their fears of my apartmentless situation. Even with my uncle, I know thy won't cease to fuss. So I was talking with my dad about this and that until he drops the news; a close zemed of ours had died. The news? not so shocking. My reaction? Most definitely! You know the me that never cries infront of people? I think my pillows have seen more tears than any human being. Well, when he dropped the bomb, I cried like a child. I really don't know what got into me ... it was bizzare.
So this zemed of mine had diabetes. She's had it for as long as I can remember. I remember us all kids, cousins and yezemed lijoch all congregating at her place on Saturdays. It is one of my most treasured memories from childhood. So it would be me, cousins in MD, and some others from back home ... very young ... saturday late afternoon sessions while our dads drank beer and did their 'ikub' thing. I remember liking her very much because she was always warm and kind to us kids. But I always noticed that she was a shadow of everyone else, by everyone i mean her brothers and sisters. You see, she has this older sister who is much more outgoing ... you know ... what you and I would refer to as 'keltafa'. This one, however nice, was just ... nice and chewa while the other one was exciting, talkative, says what she wants to say to whoever and for us kids she was the cool one.
When my parents were here, they told me that she had taken a turn for the worse. Mitish, I don't know how to explain it but ... beka ... how do you say it? anjete telawese. So I told them that I would buy her a packet of "splenda" for them to take to her. In the end darlin, yesew lij mecheresha ihew newina, I ended up not doing it and they went home empty handed. The part that hurts mitish, is when I proposed to send her the packet, I was sure it wouldn't do her any lasting good. But I wanted her to know she was ... thought of? loved even? And because I have this nonchalance disease deep within me, I neglected to do that one simple thing which would have brought a smile to her face.
Mitiye, a good friend once asked me, while I was going on and on about how awful it is to be UNable to love, "What about not being loved? I hate not being loved". Mitiye, that's exactly what entered my mind when my dad told me the news. I asked him if I should call the older sister and he "I don't think that's necessary. She's not making a big deal of it". Wow. so so cold. Mitiye, Doestovsky? Love? I have a sneaking suspicion her death was caused by diabetes just as much by lack of love. Mitiye, I really do believe that. And it makes it worse doesn't it? Ay darlin, all this to say we shan't forget our lessons on active love, however circumstances might force us to. To love or not to love? There shouldn't even be a choice.
Wedishalew.
Your disconcerted friend.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Feker to Rihana: Mama Mia
Darlin,
This might be a very long and confused post so I beg you to make the most of it. Like I told you yesterday, I went and watched Mama Mia last time, enjoyed it tremendously but couldn't help leaving the movie theatre a little down. While enjoying the beautiful costumes, amazing songs and some of the ridiculous parts of the movie, Merryl Streep decides to kill the moment for me. This she did by singing "Dancing Queen".
"You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen"
17! Darlin 17 is considered young. It was this peircing realization that I was, not only NOT seventeen but 18,19,20,21,22! Look how beautiful they look even written down? I can't believe those years have gone ... Its just scary yemir. Not to say I don't like where I am now but ... I can't have them back. They've gone ... puff ... leaving only fading memories in their wake. I kept on thinking, on the ride back, that what would be the most regrettable thing of these years. And I guess you already know the answer to that one. Mitish, ... don't know how to explain it but I wonder if we could ever really say 'I've lived my life to the fullest.' Well, except for the regrettable fact that I haven't met one guy to impress me or better yet, allowed myself to be impressed, these past years haven't been too shabby at all. And the gloom subsides ... hehe
There is a certain kind of charm to our office right this moment, most people are out on vacation leaving me with ample time to write to you; dear friend. Other than this cherished act, I've also had time to review most of my favourite blogs, not excluding newspapers from back home. You remember I told you about that column I really enjoy on Addis Admass, Inichewawet? I used to love it when I was back home, it literally had me doubling up with laughter ... the guy is talented aygeltsewim. Bicha, I was catching up on his writings since the website had stopped working for a while and now its back on. I realized, when he talks about women, habesha women to be specific, the dude, I'm afraid to say is down right sexist. Now i know what you're saying mitish, 'anchi demo, inezihinu feministoch litihogni minim alkeresh, tsegur sinteka new eko yeteyayazshiw' ... but not really babe. Honestly, I still find most of his comments funny but what dissapoints me really is that its not just him. Women in our habesha culture still don't get the respect they deserve. Mitisha, would you believe I have never once thought of my being female as a disadvantage, even when we were back home. NOT ONCE! But I'm wondering if the reason you and I never felt it was because we've been sort of sheltered from the prejudice by our parents, siblings, teachers, zemed azmad? Mitish, its amazing how recurrent this theme of the habesha woman as a fickle minded, money grabbing, just a pretty face, ... well you know the rest. Even our very own columnist on Addis Fortune alluded to the same thing ... pretty much agreeing with this friend of hers who had returned from abroad and who had asked her to introduce him to someone because he was looking to settle down or something like that. She said her mind went blank; she couldn't come up with ladies she could see this guy compatible with. I'm not criticizing what she said, but I'm just putting it out there. At least her article offered ways by which we should change this perception of our women. My question to you ... how valid is this? Are habesha women, instead of fighting the prejudice, falling into the trap set by men, i.e., melkish yibekashal kind of attitude? That there is no need to excel professionally as long as all your needs are met? This phenomenon of young beautiful ladies going for rich, older men and seeing that as an end? I don't know mitish, I mean we've talked about this in the past and judging of course has never been our thing. Leaving that aside, I feel like there needs to be a whole psychological shift in the way parents raise their little girls. We need girl heroes in our story books, girls who go out there and save the day, they need menotrs to look up to ... I don't know ... I hope you get where i'm going with this. Let me finish off by a quote I found very simple yet profound ... has nothing to do with the topic ... just found it interesting. muaah muaaah muaaaaaaaah!
"Much is expected, to whom much is given"
Lub you!
P.S. The third person has arrived safely. Called me just now complaining why returning was necessary lol ... i don't think you were too far off when you assumed marriage last time hehe.
This might be a very long and confused post so I beg you to make the most of it. Like I told you yesterday, I went and watched Mama Mia last time, enjoyed it tremendously but couldn't help leaving the movie theatre a little down. While enjoying the beautiful costumes, amazing songs and some of the ridiculous parts of the movie, Merryl Streep decides to kill the moment for me. This she did by singing "Dancing Queen".
"You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen"
17! Darlin 17 is considered young. It was this peircing realization that I was, not only NOT seventeen but 18,19,20,21,22! Look how beautiful they look even written down? I can't believe those years have gone ... Its just scary yemir. Not to say I don't like where I am now but ... I can't have them back. They've gone ... puff ... leaving only fading memories in their wake. I kept on thinking, on the ride back, that what would be the most regrettable thing of these years. And I guess you already know the answer to that one. Mitish, ... don't know how to explain it but I wonder if we could ever really say 'I've lived my life to the fullest.' Well, except for the regrettable fact that I haven't met one guy to impress me or better yet, allowed myself to be impressed, these past years haven't been too shabby at all. And the gloom subsides ... hehe
There is a certain kind of charm to our office right this moment, most people are out on vacation leaving me with ample time to write to you; dear friend. Other than this cherished act, I've also had time to review most of my favourite blogs, not excluding newspapers from back home. You remember I told you about that column I really enjoy on Addis Admass, Inichewawet? I used to love it when I was back home, it literally had me doubling up with laughter ... the guy is talented aygeltsewim. Bicha, I was catching up on his writings since the website had stopped working for a while and now its back on. I realized, when he talks about women, habesha women to be specific, the dude, I'm afraid to say is down right sexist. Now i know what you're saying mitish, 'anchi demo, inezihinu feministoch litihogni minim alkeresh, tsegur sinteka new eko yeteyayazshiw' ... but not really babe. Honestly, I still find most of his comments funny but what dissapoints me really is that its not just him. Women in our habesha culture still don't get the respect they deserve. Mitisha, would you believe I have never once thought of my being female as a disadvantage, even when we were back home. NOT ONCE! But I'm wondering if the reason you and I never felt it was because we've been sort of sheltered from the prejudice by our parents, siblings, teachers, zemed azmad? Mitish, its amazing how recurrent this theme of the habesha woman as a fickle minded, money grabbing, just a pretty face, ... well you know the rest. Even our very own columnist on Addis Fortune alluded to the same thing ... pretty much agreeing with this friend of hers who had returned from abroad and who had asked her to introduce him to someone because he was looking to settle down or something like that. She said her mind went blank; she couldn't come up with ladies she could see this guy compatible with. I'm not criticizing what she said, but I'm just putting it out there. At least her article offered ways by which we should change this perception of our women. My question to you ... how valid is this? Are habesha women, instead of fighting the prejudice, falling into the trap set by men, i.e., melkish yibekashal kind of attitude? That there is no need to excel professionally as long as all your needs are met? This phenomenon of young beautiful ladies going for rich, older men and seeing that as an end? I don't know mitish, I mean we've talked about this in the past and judging of course has never been our thing. Leaving that aside, I feel like there needs to be a whole psychological shift in the way parents raise their little girls. We need girl heroes in our story books, girls who go out there and save the day, they need menotrs to look up to ... I don't know ... I hope you get where i'm going with this. Let me finish off by a quote I found very simple yet profound ... has nothing to do with the topic ... just found it interesting. muaah muaaah muaaaaaaaah!
"Much is expected, to whom much is given"
Lub you!
P.S. The third person has arrived safely. Called me just now complaining why returning was necessary lol ... i don't think you were too far off when you assumed marriage last time hehe.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Feker to Rihana: Disjointed thoughts
Darlin,
I realized, while reading your mail from yesterday, that I can't really offer you any good, better yet, any real advice. As you know, I'm very much in the dark when it comes to matters of the heart. To me, and to you too until recently, a relationship was tantamount to disaster. I don't know where we picked up those ideas but it is a fear that is still deep within me. Like you said, without knowing why, your ship has sailed. And you really didn't know why, you said. I think I do. I do think, mitisha, looking back you saw there was something missing and so you braved it. As much as I applaud your boldness, I also believe it was the natural thing to follow. What comes afterwards, mi love, is the true 'fetena' so to say. After all, its only worth it if you're willing to fight for it. So don't stress darlin, I have a feeling like everything and by everything i mean moving here, going to MoHo, and all the other countless challenges, some things take a while to get used to.
I am now sitting and writing to you dear friend, after a long day at work, a quick 'mekses', alone in the apartment, and a thunderstorm which reminds me of our beautiful 'kiremt' back home. Couldn't have asked for a better setting. Darlin, you remember when we always said how much of our blessings we took for granted? Well this week I found another one to make me ... i don't know if the word thankful alone would describe my feeling. Mitiye, bewinet new milish when people congratulated me during graduation I couldn't help but be surprised. At home, graduating from college was you duty, not a success that should be celebrated. Honors, yes ... a good job, definitely but certainly not graduation. And yet these days, I am reminded of how precious our education is. To the point where I almost feel guilty about it, our lives are so different from the average habesha here. I mean we had heard stories when we were in MoHo but to see it fit lefit is an effective reality check. I had somehow drifted off thinking that our lives were the norm, that everyone had time to ponder, reflect and ... i don't know, take the morning off if you wanted to. The reality however is definitely less rosy. Take for example a friend's boss who hang up on her when she told him she will not be coming in that morning because she was not feeling well. She had worked for him for the past two years. Or my other friend, though she is a professional, she got a witch of a boss who refuses to give her credit for anything she does. Through all this mitiye, i can't help but see how truly blessed, lucky I am and these thoughts instead of elating me I feel this guilt I can't explain. No matter how hard I've been trying, its something I haven't been able to shake off. Hode, I think i should stop here ... i haven't written half as much as I would like but my 'cheguara' for some reason tenestoal and i need to lie down. Will continue with my disjointed thoughts tomorrow. I love you.
I realized, while reading your mail from yesterday, that I can't really offer you any good, better yet, any real advice. As you know, I'm very much in the dark when it comes to matters of the heart. To me, and to you too until recently, a relationship was tantamount to disaster. I don't know where we picked up those ideas but it is a fear that is still deep within me. Like you said, without knowing why, your ship has sailed. And you really didn't know why, you said. I think I do. I do think, mitisha, looking back you saw there was something missing and so you braved it. As much as I applaud your boldness, I also believe it was the natural thing to follow. What comes afterwards, mi love, is the true 'fetena' so to say. After all, its only worth it if you're willing to fight for it. So don't stress darlin, I have a feeling like everything and by everything i mean moving here, going to MoHo, and all the other countless challenges, some things take a while to get used to.
I am now sitting and writing to you dear friend, after a long day at work, a quick 'mekses', alone in the apartment, and a thunderstorm which reminds me of our beautiful 'kiremt' back home. Couldn't have asked for a better setting. Darlin, you remember when we always said how much of our blessings we took for granted? Well this week I found another one to make me ... i don't know if the word thankful alone would describe my feeling. Mitiye, bewinet new milish when people congratulated me during graduation I couldn't help but be surprised. At home, graduating from college was you duty, not a success that should be celebrated. Honors, yes ... a good job, definitely but certainly not graduation. And yet these days, I am reminded of how precious our education is. To the point where I almost feel guilty about it, our lives are so different from the average habesha here. I mean we had heard stories when we were in MoHo but to see it fit lefit is an effective reality check. I had somehow drifted off thinking that our lives were the norm, that everyone had time to ponder, reflect and ... i don't know, take the morning off if you wanted to. The reality however is definitely less rosy. Take for example a friend's boss who hang up on her when she told him she will not be coming in that morning because she was not feeling well. She had worked for him for the past two years. Or my other friend, though she is a professional, she got a witch of a boss who refuses to give her credit for anything she does. Through all this mitiye, i can't help but see how truly blessed, lucky I am and these thoughts instead of elating me I feel this guilt I can't explain. No matter how hard I've been trying, its something I haven't been able to shake off. Hode, I think i should stop here ... i haven't written half as much as I would like but my 'cheguara' for some reason tenestoal and i need to lie down. Will continue with my disjointed thoughts tomorrow. I love you.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Rihana to Feker - A blank mind
I didn't want you to open our blog and not find me in it, so i thought i would just put in a few words to tell you that i've tried. Currently my mind is blank. I can't think straight. Mitiye, every day i realize our naive we are, and how much i don't want to let that go. Some times i have such a hard time understanding Mamo, because i can feel that a few years back he was almost me - believed in the possibility of a beautiful life and our capacity to embrace it. But now i fear that he has lost that. He questions everything, and i don't have the answers. I don't know why people betray eachother, or why "bad things happen to good people," I don't know why we fall in love and i don't know why... well there is much i don't know. But if there is one thing that i do know, is that i won't let all these negativities put me down. I want to be able to love and laugh at the same time. With him, though i think i am way past the point where i can walk away like i've done with so many. I'm in it way too deep to have the heart to do that. I'll stick it through, but what scares me most, ones past another point ( possibly the next point) it might be too late to turn back.
I think i'm also suffering from my constant inability to express exaclty what it is i'm feeling. I do try, really do try, and sometimes i do succeed. But other times, my love, i never find the right words, or the few word which come into my head just can't do justice to what it is that i feel inside of me.
Aderashen, yehen hulu selesh, don't think i've changed. Because my darling, i haven't. I wish i could tell you that i have, that this and that has happened to me and all that BS. I still can't wait til i start school, and i can't wait til i get into my dorm and have sunday brunch and find a cozzy corner in the library. But i think what has happened is, i've taken maybe another step in life, which either one of us use to never dare of. Don't ask me why i did it, or if it is even a good idea. But like they always say, yelm teferto sayetegna ayetaderem. Do i did do it. And i guess we shall live and see. I think i'll stop... i did start off with a blank mind, but i guess it did have a few random thoughts in it... and i didn't want to break your heart with an empty page - mechem lanchi beye, ye anboha termus west new megbat yemikeregn!!( Taruku's classic saying - mechem you remember him - 5 years temehrt bet yamelalesen)
I love you
I think i'm also suffering from my constant inability to express exaclty what it is i'm feeling. I do try, really do try, and sometimes i do succeed. But other times, my love, i never find the right words, or the few word which come into my head just can't do justice to what it is that i feel inside of me.
Aderashen, yehen hulu selesh, don't think i've changed. Because my darling, i haven't. I wish i could tell you that i have, that this and that has happened to me and all that BS. I still can't wait til i start school, and i can't wait til i get into my dorm and have sunday brunch and find a cozzy corner in the library. But i think what has happened is, i've taken maybe another step in life, which either one of us use to never dare of. Don't ask me why i did it, or if it is even a good idea. But like they always say, yelm teferto sayetegna ayetaderem. Do i did do it. And i guess we shall live and see. I think i'll stop... i did start off with a blank mind, but i guess it did have a few random thoughts in it... and i didn't want to break your heart with an empty page - mechem lanchi beye, ye anboha termus west new megbat yemikeregn!!( Taruku's classic saying - mechem you remember him - 5 years temehrt bet yamelalesen)
I love you
Saturday, July 19, 2008
Feker to Rihana: Renewal of our vows
Darlin,
What can I say? Our conversation from last night keeps on resounding in my head ... its amazing how every time I talk to you a little part of me is ... how should i put it ... my naivety is renewed. And however much people might scorn me for being an idealist, better that than average any day. And babe, for this blog I thank you since its just the outlet I've been looking for to ... what was it you said ... vent? exactly! I need to vent about my apartmentless situation right now, about finding my self in a world not so rosy and people so caught up with everyday mundane details of life so many of us have forgotten about what the big picture is all about. And GOD! this certainly is not it! How do you explain millions of people slaving away, worried about their financial status 24/7 (it doesn't matter if they've been on the job 20 years, they worry just as much as the next person) ... and yet this is the dream land thousands flock to every day. And yet, I can't help but think of the few at the top who accumulate all that ... mitish there is something wrong with this picture. You see people ... existing. Sort of what we were talking about last night ... about the African American plight here. Semonun yeyazkut tsebay degmo ... whenever I walk by a homeless or a seemingly 'ibd' sew, instead of shrinking away like i did when i was a kid ... i simply imagine myself in their place and ... beka min tiyalesh mitish? But I guess what you said last night makes a lot of sense, it's beyond us to even dare try make sense of this world. All you can count and believe in is the little changes you can make at a time ... and even for that small opportunity, we shall forever be thankful to God. Darlin, now that the wirless on my laptop has miraculously started working i shall continue on. ohhhhh forgot one tiny detail ... our wanderer friend just called right now, she'll be arriving on friday. lol. she was very disappointed that she won't be staying at our apartment, even went so far as calling us loosers, four years in college has thought us nothing! (you know that saying yemitadu iyale ye inqibu tentata?!!!!) bicha ... today we shall put down in history as a sort of anniversary ... oh no ... i got a better one ... renewing our vows? lol ... GOD! was that corny or what?> bicha wededishim telashim i'm calling it that. wedishalew babe ... read you soon.
What can I say? Our conversation from last night keeps on resounding in my head ... its amazing how every time I talk to you a little part of me is ... how should i put it ... my naivety is renewed. And however much people might scorn me for being an idealist, better that than average any day. And babe, for this blog I thank you since its just the outlet I've been looking for to ... what was it you said ... vent? exactly! I need to vent about my apartmentless situation right now, about finding my self in a world not so rosy and people so caught up with everyday mundane details of life so many of us have forgotten about what the big picture is all about. And GOD! this certainly is not it! How do you explain millions of people slaving away, worried about their financial status 24/7 (it doesn't matter if they've been on the job 20 years, they worry just as much as the next person) ... and yet this is the dream land thousands flock to every day. And yet, I can't help but think of the few at the top who accumulate all that ... mitish there is something wrong with this picture. You see people ... existing. Sort of what we were talking about last night ... about the African American plight here. Semonun yeyazkut tsebay degmo ... whenever I walk by a homeless or a seemingly 'ibd' sew, instead of shrinking away like i did when i was a kid ... i simply imagine myself in their place and ... beka min tiyalesh mitish? But I guess what you said last night makes a lot of sense, it's beyond us to even dare try make sense of this world. All you can count and believe in is the little changes you can make at a time ... and even for that small opportunity, we shall forever be thankful to God. Darlin, now that the wirless on my laptop has miraculously started working i shall continue on. ohhhhh forgot one tiny detail ... our wanderer friend just called right now, she'll be arriving on friday. lol. she was very disappointed that she won't be staying at our apartment, even went so far as calling us loosers, four years in college has thought us nothing! (you know that saying yemitadu iyale ye inqibu tentata?!!!!) bicha ... today we shall put down in history as a sort of anniversary ... oh no ... i got a better one ... renewing our vows? lol ... GOD! was that corny or what?> bicha wededishim telashim i'm calling it that. wedishalew babe ... read you soon.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
From Rihana to Feker - The First of our Letters through this blog.
Aleme,
It seems like i haven't talked to you in a life time. I guess both of us being busy with our jobs - can be seen as a good excuse... well, i don't think it's good enough. I had spent the last few days thinking about a possibility of you and i runing into eachother on the streets of washington DC with our men or possibly kids 10 years from now and saying " oh... we were so close back in college! wi wi, mechem sew kalmote yegenagnal" - well if this happens - gedeyesh kerchele! i'm not kidding. I feel like we're both drawning in the realities of our every day lives, in two different states of the country, possibly going towards the path of 'indifference' when it comes to a lot of things.
My love, i don't have the luxury to take this risk, i can not possibly risk of losing the many passions we have within our selves - oh babe, how easy it is for that to happen....
My fear has initiated me to create this blog for the sake of the soul of the both of us and our futures. I've seen many people get into a life which breaks the hearts of people like you and i. and the way it looks to me at this point - we might end up being one of them. I hope you will not hate me for putting some of our previos private emails up on this blog. But it had to be done. We both need this to vent. You and I are probably going to be the two people who'll look at this blog. But the beauty of it is that it's in an organized fashion so that we will keep doing it for as long as we possibly can. It is suppose to be a constant reminder of what we believe in, the changes we've went through ( oh God if you read back on our emails, you'll see how big those changes where) and the destinations we're heading towards.
It's suppose to be a documentation of our passions, our thoughts, our dreams - a documentation of who we are. So here, i have started it, and it's now your responsibility to get it going. So next time i check my yahoo email - i don't wanna see an email from you. I'll be checking this blog. ( you'll recieve the username and password in a text on your phone.) Start blogging as soon as possible and we both have to blog at least once a week. I love you, and i have done this without your opinion because i honestly believe with everything that i am - WE NEED THIS - there is a lot at stake here!
Adnakish Ke Michigan
It seems like i haven't talked to you in a life time. I guess both of us being busy with our jobs - can be seen as a good excuse... well, i don't think it's good enough. I had spent the last few days thinking about a possibility of you and i runing into eachother on the streets of washington DC with our men or possibly kids 10 years from now and saying " oh... we were so close back in college! wi wi, mechem sew kalmote yegenagnal" - well if this happens - gedeyesh kerchele! i'm not kidding. I feel like we're both drawning in the realities of our every day lives, in two different states of the country, possibly going towards the path of 'indifference' when it comes to a lot of things.
My love, i don't have the luxury to take this risk, i can not possibly risk of losing the many passions we have within our selves - oh babe, how easy it is for that to happen....
My fear has initiated me to create this blog for the sake of the soul of the both of us and our futures. I've seen many people get into a life which breaks the hearts of people like you and i. and the way it looks to me at this point - we might end up being one of them. I hope you will not hate me for putting some of our previos private emails up on this blog. But it had to be done. We both need this to vent. You and I are probably going to be the two people who'll look at this blog. But the beauty of it is that it's in an organized fashion so that we will keep doing it for as long as we possibly can. It is suppose to be a constant reminder of what we believe in, the changes we've went through ( oh God if you read back on our emails, you'll see how big those changes where) and the destinations we're heading towards.
It's suppose to be a documentation of our passions, our thoughts, our dreams - a documentation of who we are. So here, i have started it, and it's now your responsibility to get it going. So next time i check my yahoo email - i don't wanna see an email from you. I'll be checking this blog. ( you'll recieve the username and password in a text on your phone.) Start blogging as soon as possible and we both have to blog at least once a week. I love you, and i have done this without your opinion because i honestly believe with everything that i am - WE NEED THIS - there is a lot at stake here!
Adnakish Ke Michigan
From Feker to Rihana - June 19, 2008
Hode,
K friend from now on at the very least I will need a confirmation that you are at least reading my mails if not responding … k gidigidaga iyawerahu indalehone lemawek malet new. Mitiye, I know I’ve been a bad friend in the past few weeks gin bitayign you’d be amazed I’m even surviving. Ketewat jemiro there’s work and right afterwards I have to entertain the parents minamin and its just been hectic as hell. And it feels like I’m trying to squeeze in as much time as possible with them since God knows when I’ll be seeing them again. Bitayi mitiyi bilshit argewugn lihedu new. I got used to that ‘I don’t have to worry about stuff so much cuz there are adults present’ kind of attitude and now they’re leaving and I feel like the 18 year old who was leaving her home again. Its weird but it also got me to reflect on a lot of things in my life. More about this some other time. Today I went to lunch with an intern here to the main cafeteria to sample their apparently most sought out cuisine. Mitiye, liben tamime temeleskulish. Sijemir gena keberu jemiro yalew security beka everyone SCREAMS ‘kebad sew’. The cafeteria deserves every praise I have heard so far. First thing that greeted me as I entered the doors (...). I swear mitiye the irony of it all I just couldn’t suppress the laughter bubbling inside. Siketil the cafeteria boasts any dish you might fancy, from oriental to African to plain ole pizza. And the people? They have their fantastic lunches everyday at this fantastic cafeteria while they discuss the millions starving, wretched citizens of our sad world. Something wrong with this picture? Inja mitiye, nege inem I might even end up leading these same conversations with the same people, except then they’d be my colleagues who I won’t ridicule but share common sentiments with.Ay mitisha, I swear new milish beka bicha betam azenkugn. Demo there were a lot of international people there and I imagined their lives here away from their homes of course patting themselves at the back for landing a job with the esteemed world bank (kind of like what I’m doin right about now)and never really accomplishing much for their people. You know what I want right now? I would love to have a convo with my mirror ‘Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the hypocrite of them all?” I’m not worried about the answer now in a few years???!!! The mirror will be the bane of my existence and I will only have two choices. I will either shut the mirror in its rightful place (yehone kum satin wist) and let it collect dust or I will look, listen and take charge. Darlin, I emailed Nafki last time and asked of an update from her. Lijachin is in Argentina (do you believe?) chillin nonetheless and is not sure whether she’ll be staying there for the summer or not. But she’s fine and I told her you’d have news for her and she’s not too happy about it. She thinks you’re “crazy” lol. Wedishalew mitiye … I shall call ya kesira siweta.
K friend from now on at the very least I will need a confirmation that you are at least reading my mails if not responding … k gidigidaga iyawerahu indalehone lemawek malet new. Mitiye, I know I’ve been a bad friend in the past few weeks gin bitayign you’d be amazed I’m even surviving. Ketewat jemiro there’s work and right afterwards I have to entertain the parents minamin and its just been hectic as hell. And it feels like I’m trying to squeeze in as much time as possible with them since God knows when I’ll be seeing them again. Bitayi mitiyi bilshit argewugn lihedu new. I got used to that ‘I don’t have to worry about stuff so much cuz there are adults present’ kind of attitude and now they’re leaving and I feel like the 18 year old who was leaving her home again. Its weird but it also got me to reflect on a lot of things in my life. More about this some other time. Today I went to lunch with an intern here to the main cafeteria to sample their apparently most sought out cuisine. Mitiye, liben tamime temeleskulish. Sijemir gena keberu jemiro yalew security beka everyone SCREAMS ‘kebad sew’. The cafeteria deserves every praise I have heard so far. First thing that greeted me as I entered the doors (...). I swear mitiye the irony of it all I just couldn’t suppress the laughter bubbling inside. Siketil the cafeteria boasts any dish you might fancy, from oriental to African to plain ole pizza. And the people? They have their fantastic lunches everyday at this fantastic cafeteria while they discuss the millions starving, wretched citizens of our sad world. Something wrong with this picture? Inja mitiye, nege inem I might even end up leading these same conversations with the same people, except then they’d be my colleagues who I won’t ridicule but share common sentiments with.Ay mitisha, I swear new milish beka bicha betam azenkugn. Demo there were a lot of international people there and I imagined their lives here away from their homes of course patting themselves at the back for landing a job with the esteemed world bank (kind of like what I’m doin right about now)and never really accomplishing much for their people. You know what I want right now? I would love to have a convo with my mirror ‘Mirror, mirror on the wall, who’s the hypocrite of them all?” I’m not worried about the answer now in a few years???!!! The mirror will be the bane of my existence and I will only have two choices. I will either shut the mirror in its rightful place (yehone kum satin wist) and let it collect dust or I will look, listen and take charge. Darlin, I emailed Nafki last time and asked of an update from her. Lijachin is in Argentina (do you believe?) chillin nonetheless and is not sure whether she’ll be staying there for the summer or not. But she’s fine and I told her you’d have news for her and she’s not too happy about it. She thinks you’re “crazy” lol. Wedishalew mitiye … I shall call ya kesira siweta.
From Feker to Rihan - June 17, 2008
Darlin ...
I was going through our emails, again, cuz my boss doesn't have anything for me as of this moment since i'm not in the system yet. And so i am writing to you, and the best part is that i'm getting paid for it by an organization that we all really, really love so much. (insert here: sarcasm) lol ... mitishaye, since I haven't really replied to your last e-mail, why don't i start from there. Actually, to something you said yesterday that really got me thinking. You know ... this whole idea of getting used to certain things, like you are now to M. And how you mentioned that the reason things seem so bad right now is because maybe you're thinking this is the norm, having someone in your life who makes you say 'i'm not alone in this world'. Sure we have our families and friends but i don't need to tell you that it is not quite the same feeling. My advice babe: go with the flow, the worst thing you could do is fight this feeling. And i do believe you will comeout a better person for it. (anchi amedam you're probably sayin in your head: i'm the BEST person, what is she talkin about. hehe) On another note, like i mentioned earlier i was sitting here and reading our emails. Mitish, do you beleive? I already miss us. Not even in the sense of us being physically together (although you shot that down to hell as well by declaring you'll be gallivanting wiz Mr. M in F hehe) ... but also the idealistic us who are full of passion for life, school, work, people ... add music and religion here and there and voila ... a couple of naive kids who have visions for a better world. aydel ende? (your answer here should have been a resounding ENDETA!) nways babe, aygermim ... already i feel that slipping away. Don't get me wrong mitish, Egzer yazilkilign inji i think i'm gonna really enjoy working here. Its something that i'm passionate about, the perfect environment for networking and the mesria bet is small enough you actually get to know the people minanim. But that I'm gonna change the world attitude is disappearing as I find myself as a tinyspeck in this whirlwind of what they call life. I feel overwhelmed and so ... small. Apart from furthering my own professional and personal life, I am so scared my life will have nothing else. You know, it will all be about me. I'm so scared i'm gonna end up being one of those zenach moms who ... i swear mitish, i'm literally out of words. This is exactly what i mean. I would have the 'perfect' life and it would all be about me, me ME! And all those thoughts would have been for nothing ... puff ... somethin i will laughingly tell my equally zenach soccer mom friend about how naive, driven and idealistic i was back then. Ok this subject is too depressing to even contemplate and frankly i don't even know where i'm goin with this. sorry about the jumble darlin.Onto more interesting stuff. Mitish meches ahun ye office gossip kaljemerku meche? fit le fite office wist yalew lij kemamaru yetenesa i am regrettting man fitu getirugn indalachew. actually, mamar sayhon a certain ooze of confidence and quirkiness ... lenegeru min aswashegn, konjom new. i think yene roshan ager lij new, minus that ear-piercing, painful accent of course. lela man ale ... mitish lol i think i'm the baby in the office ina its kinda awakward. kahun behuala yedime tiyake avoid betam lemareg iyemokerkugn new ... ho ho ... demo buna afiyi indaymeta kes bilo. hehe ... mitiye benatish betechale meten aydebrish eshi? i know that's an inadequate matsnagna gin i don't even know what to tell ya. but i have faith in you ... you'll be back to your old self before you know it. me loves you ... i don't need to tell u to write back. yanchiw always,mititi.
I was going through our emails, again, cuz my boss doesn't have anything for me as of this moment since i'm not in the system yet. And so i am writing to you, and the best part is that i'm getting paid for it by an organization that we all really, really love so much. (insert here: sarcasm) lol ... mitishaye, since I haven't really replied to your last e-mail, why don't i start from there. Actually, to something you said yesterday that really got me thinking. You know ... this whole idea of getting used to certain things, like you are now to M. And how you mentioned that the reason things seem so bad right now is because maybe you're thinking this is the norm, having someone in your life who makes you say 'i'm not alone in this world'. Sure we have our families and friends but i don't need to tell you that it is not quite the same feeling. My advice babe: go with the flow, the worst thing you could do is fight this feeling. And i do believe you will comeout a better person for it. (anchi amedam you're probably sayin in your head: i'm the BEST person, what is she talkin about. hehe) On another note, like i mentioned earlier i was sitting here and reading our emails. Mitish, do you beleive? I already miss us. Not even in the sense of us being physically together (although you shot that down to hell as well by declaring you'll be gallivanting wiz Mr. M in F hehe) ... but also the idealistic us who are full of passion for life, school, work, people ... add music and religion here and there and voila ... a couple of naive kids who have visions for a better world. aydel ende? (your answer here should have been a resounding ENDETA!) nways babe, aygermim ... already i feel that slipping away. Don't get me wrong mitish, Egzer yazilkilign inji i think i'm gonna really enjoy working here. Its something that i'm passionate about, the perfect environment for networking and the mesria bet is small enough you actually get to know the people minanim. But that I'm gonna change the world attitude is disappearing as I find myself as a tinyspeck in this whirlwind of what they call life. I feel overwhelmed and so ... small. Apart from furthering my own professional and personal life, I am so scared my life will have nothing else. You know, it will all be about me. I'm so scared i'm gonna end up being one of those zenach moms who ... i swear mitish, i'm literally out of words. This is exactly what i mean. I would have the 'perfect' life and it would all be about me, me ME! And all those thoughts would have been for nothing ... puff ... somethin i will laughingly tell my equally zenach soccer mom friend about how naive, driven and idealistic i was back then. Ok this subject is too depressing to even contemplate and frankly i don't even know where i'm goin with this. sorry about the jumble darlin.Onto more interesting stuff. Mitish meches ahun ye office gossip kaljemerku meche? fit le fite office wist yalew lij kemamaru yetenesa i am regrettting man fitu getirugn indalachew. actually, mamar sayhon a certain ooze of confidence and quirkiness ... lenegeru min aswashegn, konjom new. i think yene roshan ager lij new, minus that ear-piercing, painful accent of course. lela man ale ... mitish lol i think i'm the baby in the office ina its kinda awakward. kahun behuala yedime tiyake avoid betam lemareg iyemokerkugn new ... ho ho ... demo buna afiyi indaymeta kes bilo. hehe ... mitiye benatish betechale meten aydebrish eshi? i know that's an inadequate matsnagna gin i don't even know what to tell ya. but i have faith in you ... you'll be back to your old self before you know it. me loves you ... i don't need to tell u to write back. yanchiw always,mititi.
From Rihana to Feker - June 15, 2008
Aleme, I called you a couple times and it seems life in DC> is kicking your ass. Well, i finally have found a computer> so thought it would be a good time to vent a little bit.> Sadly my venting doesn't consist of the derk in> Ethiopia or anything in that line. I won't be> articulate or attempt to go beyond my usual self... babe, i> will apologize before hand if my email sounds not just> pessimistic but plane... what's the word?... sad maybe.> For some reason today has been one of those sad days.> I'm scared of something which i do not know about. I> guess it's because i have a lot of time to myself and> don't have my laptop to keep me busy. I feel numb for> some reason. But most of all Mitiye, i feel like i've> lost something in me. Some sort of substance in me which> use to motivate me... you don't know...i had started> praying, and i'm so embarrassed to say that i struggle> to keep up. It kills me. There is just something i feel has> disappeared in me for some reason -> especially these days. And what is more contradictory is> that i've been in an environment which is so motivating> for that past week... i guess tonight seems very much> related to that one lonesome night in Cairo, remember?> Things feel dim, lonely... Mitiye, Mamoma baynor i> don't know what i would have felt like. I do think he> could not have entered my life at a better time. He wakes> me up every morning and it's him i talk to each night> before i go to bed. Would you think i was crazy if i told> you ___? is that even possible? The definitions might differ, but all i know is that he puts a smile> on my face and has never said a single thing to make me> feel weird... i feel like my email is very inappropriate as> a reply to yours, especially because of all the negative> tone it carries within it. I do apologize. > I really can't wait to graduate. i really can't.> I'm still praying everyday that my destiny leads me> back home. I was talking to Ha the other day and oh how> i wished i was there. i know i have no reasons to feel this> way, but i think i'm just feeling too lonely... or i> don't know. it's one of those nights when i want to> hide under my covers and think the world out of its> existence! i feel weak for some reason, i feel quite... Ayi> yi, ayesh Mamo endet endekeledebegn.. i feel i feel, ahun> men yemiyasbel neger meta... egzer yestew...> > becha aleme, i don't know what i've written so far,> if it is confusing to you... well it's cuz I’m in a confused> state of mind... i better go and ... well hope for the best.> i love you.
Chapter Two -From Feker to Rihana - June 10, 2008
babe! I'm like so lost without our mails :). Seriouslythough ... that mediocrity spell, I feel, is fastapproaching. And this fabulous gal needs to dosomething about it. And what better company thananother equally fabulous gal? (the former being me thelatter you ... lol ... ) Nways, babe ... how goes it?I think an email from you is long overdue since youhave so much to share while my life currently consistsof arguing with my mom like a sixteen year old abouttiny details like which color my 'ansola' needs to beor how i should have learnt how to cook a long timeago like she told me to so that I won't starve nextyear. yeah! real exciting! But other than that, Ican't ask for more, except maybe a bit moreinternational news on CNN just so I wouldn't have tolook at another update about Hulk Hogan or whateverhis face is and his son's trial ( i'm still hazy overthe details). Today mitish the ppl upstairs invited us over for'buna' which of course also involved an elaboratelayout of buffe and just as I was about to dig intothe doro wot, our very own emaciated ppl came on T.V.,harbingers of yet another dirq that is threatening tohit our country sometime in September. And ... inja... yehone neger tenanekegn takialesh mitish. Beka Idon't quite know how to describe it ... just the sheerinjustice of it all beka betam azenku. Just like theadults all i did was give lip service and chant, 'ayyachi yaltadelech ager!' then moved on to some teraconversation about how when ppl are hungry they can becapable of the most 'insane' things. Ay mitish, gidyeleshim sometimes minew indeneza sewoch baregegnilalew. You know those ppl, who never look back? Wewere talkin about the same subject with Y theother day he was also saying how a lot of his friendscouldn't care less whether they returned or not. Infact, most of them are so very content with theirlives here. He on the other hand, wants to teach at aUniversity not because he particularly likes theprofession but because it would afford him to go toEthiopia during breaks. And then it hit me. People whosuffer most are those who are in between, sort of likehow we are right now. We can't tear ourselves away butwe can't just pick up and leave. Mitish, plz plz don'tcall me negative but sometimes i'm scared to have theguts to leave one day and there would be no country togo back to. I know that's not gonna happen ginsometimes i'm so scared that the we might end upsharing Somalia's fate. Sibihattttttttttt! Bicha hun,sorry for the somber letter, I just had to vent. Willbe expecting to read u soon. wedishalew.
From Feker to Rihana - Spring break - 2008
Mitiye,
I was goin for ma diary, decided to check my mail, got
ur message and so here goes. Tilantina zare, I've been
hangin out with Earth. We met for the first time
yesterday after well, a year and half friendship.
Yigermal
mitiye, lijinet endet arif neger new? WOUF! Its the
most eko amazing thing ... bicha bizu salfelasef wede
kum negeru. Mitish, is it weird that I really liked
him? Now, the thing i don't understand is ... did I
like him because i knew he had a girlfriend and
therefore not a threat to myself? Inja mitish, gin
yesterday it was just the two of us, today he
introduced me to a bunch of his friends ...
betaaaaaaaaaaaam des yemilu group (typical sanjo boys)
and we had a blast. For the very first time in this
country, I laughed 'hoden yije' with people other than
you and a select few. Yemiyasazinew eko mitish, nege
if this guy became single and asked me out I would of
course freak and perform one of my disappearing acts
until 'zeraf' bilo dewilo 'hell gibi' eskemilegn ...
lol ... Mitiye gin yigermal Earth, in a way he's
closer to the ideal guy than anyone else. He's ...
real. Betam genuine, well informed, hella funny
(leziayawim yabesha funny newa) n all that. Its a
wonder he's not with another Earth one mitish, a wonder
and a shame. He could have made her real happy. We
talked about his girlfriend (a little)and he said _____
(This was in reference to the fact that I had
a blast with his friends) ... Bicha mitish ... this
amazing guy is gonna settle down with a non-Earth who
will never really appreciate his Earthly self ...
mitiye, yegnanis man awekelin indeed!
wedishalew ... see u soon yene wud.
I was goin for ma diary, decided to check my mail, got
ur message and so here goes. Tilantina zare, I've been
hangin out with Earth. We met for the first time
yesterday after well, a year and half friendship.
Yigermal
mitiye, lijinet endet arif neger new? WOUF! Its the
most eko amazing thing ... bicha bizu salfelasef wede
kum negeru. Mitish, is it weird that I really liked
him? Now, the thing i don't understand is ... did I
like him because i knew he had a girlfriend and
therefore not a threat to myself? Inja mitish, gin
yesterday it was just the two of us, today he
introduced me to a bunch of his friends ...
betaaaaaaaaaaaam des yemilu group (typical sanjo boys)
and we had a blast. For the very first time in this
country, I laughed 'hoden yije' with people other than
you and a select few. Yemiyasazinew eko mitish, nege
if this guy became single and asked me out I would of
course freak and perform one of my disappearing acts
until 'zeraf' bilo dewilo 'hell gibi' eskemilegn ...
lol ... Mitiye gin yigermal Earth, in a way he's
closer to the ideal guy than anyone else. He's ...
real. Betam genuine, well informed, hella funny
(leziayawim yabesha funny newa) n all that. Its a
wonder he's not with another Earth one mitish, a wonder
and a shame. He could have made her real happy. We
talked about his girlfriend (a little)and he said _____
(This was in reference to the fact that I had
a blast with his friends) ... Bicha mitish ... this
amazing guy is gonna settle down with a non-Earth who
will never really appreciate his Earthly self ...
mitiye, yegnanis man awekelin indeed!
wedishalew ... see u soon yene wud.
From Rihana to Feker - Spring break, 2008
> Darlin, Kedamew endet yezoshal? Mitiye, i'm in one
> of my panicking moments. I have three papers to hand
> in by friday ena i'm freaking out. Beza lay i don't
> have time here to do it, with all the socializing
> stuff. Allah alegn mechem. I can't believe i keep
> messin up in the last minute - alastelam... gen my
> media paper written in only a couple hours turned
> out to be cool... ( ayesh What that dude Paulo said,
> once you know your destiny the universe conspires to
> help you walk in that direction) Becha wede wana
> wereye legwaz.
>
> Last night i went to see the lady in Colorado, awekshat aydel? ( oh
> and before that i got my hair done, i look dead
> gorgeous! - men yaregal Moho will take its toll on
> me in a couple days) becha, i'm not use if i've told
> you that she got married. When i heard about it in
> Addis i wasn't sure about the situation, you know
> the guy might have married her for her papers or.. i
> wasn't sure where exactly they would live... you
> know those kinds of logistics... Becha we she
> started telling me how they met and all that good
> stuff. Well she didn't meet him through family,
> which is a good thing, especially being from a
> family with great potential to be nosy. He's a
> lawyer working in Addis. Becha, from all the things
> she was talking about, she was telling me how this
> time she's so sure that this is the man she wants to
> be with. It was great, cuz through out the years i
> can't even begin to tell you how many guys she
> turned down for one reason or another. Gen this time
> she said the classic cliché " BEKA
> BEWESTE TAWEKEGN"!!!!!!!!!!!! Ay bewest metawek.
> Even tho i was very happy for her, it was too much
> and my pessimist self would not lie still. One was
> how in the world did she survive all these years
> ALONE? as if she knew what i was thinking merdoyen
> atnegregn meselesh. she was like - it's hard being
> alone and that i should be open to relationships,
> mitiye only about a year ago she was telling me how
> young i was and how i shouldn't be thinking about
> these things bla bla. Now it's a whole other story.
> Can you believe, the lady who thought i was crazy
> for wanting to go back home, had decided she'd do
> the exact same thing in only a couple of years!!!
> Becha men elalew... yegnanew mecheresha yasayen
> beye.... keza she wanted me to tell her about my
> 'experiences' yeah right!, becha yeferedebet E
> tenesana, i told her about him....
> Mitisha you know what was so funny? i feel
> like i talk about different guys depending on the
> situation. It's the crazies thing. And what is more
> crazy is that at every different occasion, i feel
> like may be 'this' person was the best one for me.
> Like i said "this" person being different with every
> occasion. I just felt it yesterday. I was telling
> her about E and i was feeling like oh shit,
> things have been amazing if i ended up with him. Gen
> believe me, if i was in a different situation, i
> would start thinking oh maybe Y would be the best
> thing. Mitiye, am i thinking that i'm living in a
> stinking NOVEL!!! i'm not kidding, Ahun telant i was
> thinking oh maybe i did like Elias the most!? Gen
> later on, wii ere aydelem M’s... Mitiye... i have
> no heart i'm telling you. Derew biyaskemetugn
> sayeshal alkerem. Betam new gen yemigermew.
> Becha at the end of the day, When i hear people
> like the lady and the uncle about the importance of
> relationships, well i choke and freak out and all
> that stuff. GUDACHEN NEW YEMIYASBELEGN. bekerb
> ametat agere tekleye begeba endaygermesh
> lemanegnawem.
> ... Mitiye,.. i just finished eating an amazing
> breakfast Hana just cooked, mitisha ende arogit all
> i do is chill around and they take care of me eshi.
> Mechem allah yestachew. Oh shit and i don't even
> know how i'm going to drive from Hartford to Moho
> tomorrow night! I don't want to ask him to come
> and pick me up at midnight. Gude fela eshi! Becha
> darlin... yekebaterkutenem alawkem. Hana is sitting
> next to me so tenesh lawarat.....mua mua mua
>
> of my panicking moments. I have three papers to hand
> in by friday ena i'm freaking out. Beza lay i don't
> have time here to do it, with all the socializing
> stuff. Allah alegn mechem. I can't believe i keep
> messin up in the last minute - alastelam... gen my
> media paper written in only a couple hours turned
> out to be cool... ( ayesh What that dude Paulo said,
> once you know your destiny the universe conspires to
> help you walk in that direction) Becha wede wana
> wereye legwaz.
>
> Last night i went to see the lady in Colorado, awekshat aydel? ( oh
> and before that i got my hair done, i look dead
> gorgeous! - men yaregal Moho will take its toll on
> me in a couple days) becha, i'm not use if i've told
> you that she got married. When i heard about it in
> Addis i wasn't sure about the situation, you know
> the guy might have married her for her papers or.. i
> wasn't sure where exactly they would live... you
> know those kinds of logistics... Becha we she
> started telling me how they met and all that good
> stuff. Well she didn't meet him through family,
> which is a good thing, especially being from a
> family with great potential to be nosy. He's a
> lawyer working in Addis. Becha, from all the things
> she was talking about, she was telling me how this
> time she's so sure that this is the man she wants to
> be with. It was great, cuz through out the years i
> can't even begin to tell you how many guys she
> turned down for one reason or another. Gen this time
> she said the classic cliché " BEKA
> BEWESTE TAWEKEGN"!!!!!!!!!!!! Ay bewest metawek.
> Even tho i was very happy for her, it was too much
> and my pessimist self would not lie still. One was
> how in the world did she survive all these years
> ALONE? as if she knew what i was thinking merdoyen
> atnegregn meselesh. she was like - it's hard being
> alone and that i should be open to relationships,
> mitiye only about a year ago she was telling me how
> young i was and how i shouldn't be thinking about
> these things bla bla. Now it's a whole other story.
> Can you believe, the lady who thought i was crazy
> for wanting to go back home, had decided she'd do
> the exact same thing in only a couple of years!!!
> Becha men elalew... yegnanew mecheresha yasayen
> beye.... keza she wanted me to tell her about my
> 'experiences' yeah right!, becha yeferedebet E
> tenesana, i told her about him....
> Mitisha you know what was so funny? i feel
> like i talk about different guys depending on the
> situation. It's the crazies thing. And what is more
> crazy is that at every different occasion, i feel
> like may be 'this' person was the best one for me.
> Like i said "this" person being different with every
> occasion. I just felt it yesterday. I was telling
> her about E and i was feeling like oh shit,
> things have been amazing if i ended up with him. Gen
> believe me, if i was in a different situation, i
> would start thinking oh maybe Y would be the best
> thing. Mitiye, am i thinking that i'm living in a
> stinking NOVEL!!! i'm not kidding, Ahun telant i was
> thinking oh maybe i did like Elias the most!? Gen
> later on, wii ere aydelem M’s... Mitiye... i have
> no heart i'm telling you. Derew biyaskemetugn
> sayeshal alkerem. Betam new gen yemigermew.
> Becha at the end of the day, When i hear people
> like the lady and the uncle about the importance of
> relationships, well i choke and freak out and all
> that stuff. GUDACHEN NEW YEMIYASBELEGN. bekerb
> ametat agere tekleye begeba endaygermesh
> lemanegnawem.
> ... Mitiye,.. i just finished eating an amazing
> breakfast Hana just cooked, mitisha ende arogit all
> i do is chill around and they take care of me eshi.
> Mechem allah yestachew. Oh shit and i don't even
> know how i'm going to drive from Hartford to Moho
> tomorrow night! I don't want to ask him to come
> and pick me up at midnight. Gude fela eshi! Becha
> darlin... yekebaterkutenem alawkem. Hana is sitting
> next to me so tenesh lawarat.....mua mua mua
>
From Feker to Rihana - End of December
Yene Fikir,
Let's raise our glasses to yet another brilliant idea
of yours. Beijigu ismamalew, we sooooooooooooo need to
continue doin what we do best, philosophizing be bado
meda ... lol ... and THAT's why we have the best of
both worlds yene wud. I was leafing through a copy of
"addis admas" my uncle brought from back home and this
guy, i think he's the head of yared music timirt bet
or somethin but in his interview, when asked who he
admired in this world, he replied, 'too many to count
and amongst them, there are people who are neither
famous nor rich'. Going back to the concept of being a
positive force in this world. He also said 'i never
knew hating people took up so much energy ... leka
sewin bemewded ignaw nen minitekemew' ... the guy
sounds interesting. Bicha going back to our discussion
of being a positive force in this world. Mitish, even
in the past few days, I have encountered so many
things to make me cringe about my 'yedilot' nuro. And
yet, I look at my uncle and think, this guy is neither
educated nor rich but he is an inspiration. He works
too jobs, barely has time to sit down and chill with
us but oh mitish, satisfaction is written ALL over his
face. not blabber on about him but it got me thinkin.
And this also goes back to an episode of sex n the
city where Carry mentions how we are always waiting
for the ONE thing that will complete everything. The
ONE could be a guy, a job, a house, a car da da da ...
To get past that, to live to your OWN expectations
(which surprisingly are higher than our loved ones have
of us), to live the life you've always dreamed of, to
be that person in the room who makes others forget
about their problems even for a little while ... to be
all that mitish, we have to fight that MENGA amongst
MENGA fight, mediocrity in all its hideous forms. And
to that effect my love, our emails are an absolute
necessity. muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah ... 'LE'n begugit
itebikalew ...
Let's raise our glasses to yet another brilliant idea
of yours. Beijigu ismamalew, we sooooooooooooo need to
continue doin what we do best, philosophizing be bado
meda ... lol ... and THAT's why we have the best of
both worlds yene wud. I was leafing through a copy of
"addis admas" my uncle brought from back home and this
guy, i think he's the head of yared music timirt bet
or somethin but in his interview, when asked who he
admired in this world, he replied, 'too many to count
and amongst them, there are people who are neither
famous nor rich'. Going back to the concept of being a
positive force in this world. He also said 'i never
knew hating people took up so much energy ... leka
sewin bemewded ignaw nen minitekemew' ... the guy
sounds interesting. Bicha going back to our discussion
of being a positive force in this world. Mitish, even
in the past few days, I have encountered so many
things to make me cringe about my 'yedilot' nuro. And
yet, I look at my uncle and think, this guy is neither
educated nor rich but he is an inspiration. He works
too jobs, barely has time to sit down and chill with
us but oh mitish, satisfaction is written ALL over his
face. not blabber on about him but it got me thinkin.
And this also goes back to an episode of sex n the
city where Carry mentions how we are always waiting
for the ONE thing that will complete everything. The
ONE could be a guy, a job, a house, a car da da da ...
To get past that, to live to your OWN expectations
(which surprisingly are higher than our loved ones have
of us), to live the life you've always dreamed of, to
be that person in the room who makes others forget
about their problems even for a little while ... to be
all that mitish, we have to fight that MENGA amongst
MENGA fight, mediocrity in all its hideous forms. And
to that effect my love, our emails are an absolute
necessity. muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah ... 'LE'n begugit
itebikalew ...
From Rihana to Feker - Final days in Cairo
> Babe, DC endet yezoshal. So this is what happened -
> i have a paper to hand in about 4 hours, but my
> smart self just figured to ignore that and go
> through old emails. ( the stuff i come up with to
> procrastinate! - and ken gedel becha yezogn
> endaygeba) Becha, here is my point - YOU HAVE TO
> LEAVE MOHO. i'm not kidding. I've decided it's time
> for you to leave, of course until that happens, i'll
> be spending fifty percent of my time in your room,
> philosophizing and not getting my work done. Anchima
> cheresesh enen gedel ketechign. Yabesha mecheresha
> deros!! Wi... yeye kebatarinete yet
> endemiyadersegn... my main point... men hone
> meselesh i was reading your emails i got when i was
> in Cairo and it hit me - we need to get back to
> those days. You know how we were talking the other
> day how vital it is to remind each other of so many
> things so that we won't sink into being MENGAS among
> MENGAS. well the emails were just that - a reminder.
> Not even that, some of the feelings i've forgotten
> about, and it all came back to me while i was
> reading it. It's better than diaries or any of that
> ferenji stuff or anything. and i'll need all of
> that, so that i can have you on my show in a couple
> years and we can have a whole discussion about it.
> Eshi... teru leza beka i just wanted to let you know
> that this email is one of many to come.
> Emails should vary from hearts to brains to bodies
> to spirits to shoes to guys to dinners to Ethiopia
> to Arabs, latino, frenchs, to Guccis to D & Gs...
> everything.... mua mua mua mua my darlin... i'll
> talk to you later...
> i have a paper to hand in about 4 hours, but my
> smart self just figured to ignore that and go
> through old emails. ( the stuff i come up with to
> procrastinate! - and ken gedel becha yezogn
> endaygeba) Becha, here is my point - YOU HAVE TO
> LEAVE MOHO. i'm not kidding. I've decided it's time
> for you to leave, of course until that happens, i'll
> be spending fifty percent of my time in your room,
> philosophizing and not getting my work done. Anchima
> cheresesh enen gedel ketechign. Yabesha mecheresha
> deros!! Wi... yeye kebatarinete yet
> endemiyadersegn... my main point... men hone
> meselesh i was reading your emails i got when i was
> in Cairo and it hit me - we need to get back to
> those days. You know how we were talking the other
> day how vital it is to remind each other of so many
> things so that we won't sink into being MENGAS among
> MENGAS. well the emails were just that - a reminder.
> Not even that, some of the feelings i've forgotten
> about, and it all came back to me while i was
> reading it. It's better than diaries or any of that
> ferenji stuff or anything. and i'll need all of
> that, so that i can have you on my show in a couple
> years and we can have a whole discussion about it.
> Eshi... teru leza beka i just wanted to let you know
> that this email is one of many to come.
> Emails should vary from hearts to brains to bodies
> to spirits to shoes to guys to dinners to Ethiopia
> to Arabs, latino, frenchs, to Guccis to D & Gs...
> everything.... mua mua mua mua my darlin... i'll
> talk to you later...
From Feker to Rihana - Dec 17, 2008
Mitiye, hode, mi love ... endet neshilign? betam
nafkeshignal ... betam betam! Have you ever felt so
lost and so complete at the same time? Mitish, endet
arige explain indemaregewim alakim. Its this weird
state I find myself in ... sort of suspended in space
... so beautifully lost and confused. Let me share
something which I have dubbed 'mcbealism'. Ally Mcbeal
was a T.V. show which I was sort of addicted to when I
was home. In one episode she says
"The real truth is I probably don't want to be too
happy or content. Cuz ... then what? I actually like
the quest, the search. That's the fun. And the more
lost you are the more you have to look forward to.
What do you know? I'm having a great time and I don't
even know it."
Now that is something don't you think? Mitiye ... I
said in your note on facebook that vulnerability is
such a beautiful thing. I meant it darlin, I meant it
with all my heart. Another character in the same show
says, explaining why he secretly loves Ally, "She
understands loneliness, and she's not afraid to admit
it." I think like you said, it all boils down to that.
The fear, the beautiful fear of being vulnerable.
Yasferal and yet you can't deny its beauty. Its what
makes us human after all. Lemin indemikebatir alakim
mitish, I'm just in this really weird mood and thought
I would share it with you.
on Mcbealism for a second, I think mitish that IS
my problem. I have this picture in my head, ere
sometimes I even feel it, of what love should be. I
have never encountered anything that even came close
to it. I think I had a psychological breakthrough when
I realize that maybe I don't allow myself that luxury
is because I'm afraid of happiness. Mitiye, I know it
doesn't make ANY sense gin I just can't get the
thought out of my mind. Maybe I'm scared of finding it
and then .... yeah .... then what? For the first time
I understood Nafi and her fear of boredom. Darling ...
beka, I will expect an email and not a short one
either. I have two more exams to go and we're off to
New York and D.C. for break (which for some reason,
I'm not even a tiny tiny bit excited about.)
muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, can't wait till you come back mi love.
nafkeshignal ... betam betam! Have you ever felt so
lost and so complete at the same time? Mitish, endet
arige explain indemaregewim alakim. Its this weird
state I find myself in ... sort of suspended in space
... so beautifully lost and confused. Let me share
something which I have dubbed 'mcbealism'. Ally Mcbeal
was a T.V. show which I was sort of addicted to when I
was home. In one episode she says
"The real truth is I probably don't want to be too
happy or content. Cuz ... then what? I actually like
the quest, the search. That's the fun. And the more
lost you are the more you have to look forward to.
What do you know? I'm having a great time and I don't
even know it."
Now that is something don't you think? Mitiye ... I
said in your note on facebook that vulnerability is
such a beautiful thing. I meant it darlin, I meant it
with all my heart. Another character in the same show
says, explaining why he secretly loves Ally, "She
understands loneliness, and she's not afraid to admit
it." I think like you said, it all boils down to that.
The fear, the beautiful fear of being vulnerable.
Yasferal and yet you can't deny its beauty. Its what
makes us human after all. Lemin indemikebatir alakim
mitish, I'm just in this really weird mood and thought
I would share it with you.
on Mcbealism for a second, I think mitish that IS
my problem. I have this picture in my head, ere
sometimes I even feel it, of what love should be. I
have never encountered anything that even came close
to it. I think I had a psychological breakthrough when
I realize that maybe I don't allow myself that luxury
is because I'm afraid of happiness. Mitiye, I know it
doesn't make ANY sense gin I just can't get the
thought out of my mind. Maybe I'm scared of finding it
and then .... yeah .... then what? For the first time
I understood Nafi and her fear of boredom. Darling ...
beka, I will expect an email and not a short one
either. I have two more exams to go and we're off to
New York and D.C. for break (which for some reason,
I'm not even a tiny tiny bit excited about.)
muaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, can't wait till you come back mi love.
From Feker to Rihana - Dec 2, 2007
Mitiye, I don't know whether to call this a funny
coincidence or a freaky one gin ... yesterday I think,
I was thinking how I kinda missed genaneh and how he's
been behaving so well since I never even heard you
complain about him. Betam yigermal. But at least he
got the appreciation he deserved from two very
ungrateful people before he departed. Is all good ...
(as our pips here would say). Mitish, I understand
what hurt was not loosing him per se gin all that was
in him. Did I tell you that when I got back to MoHo I
lost ALL my stuff in storage. Mitish, I can't even
begin to tell you how devastated I was. In the end I
ended up retrieving the box which had all my personal
momentos, old pictures and stuff like that and
everything was just fine again. I still had to
replenish my winter wardrobe, I literally was left
with NADA. Bicha mitish ... so proud you took it all
in and moved on. (can't say i'm surprised though) ...
this quality in you shall never perish mitish b/c its
soooooooooooooo hard to get as life gets more
complicated and heartbreaks become commonplace. To
quote someone on seleda (she was talking about
habeshoch she admired) " pusit yalu positivoch" and
you personify that. darlin, do you realize its these
very seemingly 'little' frustrations that end up
making us bitter? lemanignawim hode concentrate on the
work now and send me your thoughts when you get a
break. muaaaaaaaaaaaaaah mi love!
coincidence or a freaky one gin ... yesterday I think,
I was thinking how I kinda missed genaneh and how he's
been behaving so well since I never even heard you
complain about him. Betam yigermal. But at least he
got the appreciation he deserved from two very
ungrateful people before he departed. Is all good ...
(as our pips here would say). Mitish, I understand
what hurt was not loosing him per se gin all that was
in him. Did I tell you that when I got back to MoHo I
lost ALL my stuff in storage. Mitish, I can't even
begin to tell you how devastated I was. In the end I
ended up retrieving the box which had all my personal
momentos, old pictures and stuff like that and
everything was just fine again. I still had to
replenish my winter wardrobe, I literally was left
with NADA. Bicha mitish ... so proud you took it all
in and moved on. (can't say i'm surprised though) ...
this quality in you shall never perish mitish b/c its
soooooooooooooo hard to get as life gets more
complicated and heartbreaks become commonplace. To
quote someone on seleda (she was talking about
habeshoch she admired) " pusit yalu positivoch" and
you personify that. darlin, do you realize its these
very seemingly 'little' frustrations that end up
making us bitter? lemanignawim hode concentrate on the
work now and send me your thoughts when you get a
break. muaaaaaaaaaaaaaah mi love!
From Rihana to Feker - Dec 2, 2007
> Mitisha, i'll have to wait to reply to your other
> email yet again. Because a new incident has
> happened. Yesterday i had to be separated from
> Genanew. Darling, tamgnalesh, i was doing work in
> the library and i had moved away from my desk for
> what could not have been for more than 10 minutes,
> when i returned someone had stolen genanew and my
> cell phone. There was absolutely nothing that could
> be done. Mitiye, endet tensekseke endaleksku betayi
> atamgnim neber. and surprisingly, after i came to
> Egypt, i've been soo attached to him and he's been
> behaving wonderfully well. and the funny part was
> that i was thinking this only a couple days ago. I
> take him everywhere i go since all the cafe's here
> have internet access. I had put all my Egypt diaries
> in a beautiful order and had been writing a lot. i
> had put all the pictures( thousands of them) from
> Harar, Addis, Egypt. Darling everything… into thin
> air. I couldn't believe such a thing had happened to
> me. and you know i don't get
> attached to anything. but is was not loosing
> something that's material. You know how i never
> really liked him at first right, gen it just had too
> many things in it. this is aside the fact that i
> have five papers to hand in the next ten days and
> i've lost everything. Mitisha nights of research is
> gone. Ahun meseksek yansegnal.
>
> Gen it also made me realize something. Mitisha
> alhamdulilah, allah teru sew adergo fetrognal, i'm
> not kidding mitisha. it's not about being one way or
> another. I realized i had a good heart and i
> realized how thankful I had to be for being blessed
> with it. Mitisha, there was a kid who was sitting
> in front of me, when i was doing work and when i
> realized what happened i started crying and i asked
> if he had seen anyone. He told me no. I was so
> careful not to be rude so i smiled said ok and left.
> Later on was when my friend brought up the idea that
> he might know a lot more than he let out, i never
> for a second suspected him. But that's not what i
> wanted to say. Tenesh keteregagaw bewhala, you know
> what came to mind. i was not angry at the person who
> took it, the first thing was - maybe whoever took it
> was some kid with a lot of problems, maybe he was
> the only one without a laptop among his friends,
> maybe he wanted money for something very important.
> Mitisha andem i never
> thought a negative thing. i was sad that i had lost
> him forever, but i was never angry. when i realized
> this later, betam des yalegn, i was amazed that i
> had actually thought that way. One thing i hate in
> people is when they are constantly suspicious of
> others. endet endemideberegn. when some of the
> American kids ask me to watch their belongings to go
> to the bathroom or something my reaction is always
> like - wiii enezi demo deros sew mamen mech yawkalu,
> or something like, what now you're in a third world
> country you think everyone is a thief... bla bla
> bla, betam yanadegn neber. Now even though i
> definitely realize how right they are to be careful,
> i also fell in love with my self ( surprise suprise!
> ) for still having faith in other people, for having
> the believe that people are inherently good. No
> matter how unrealistic it may seem for some people
> or crazy, it felt good to believe it. I still do,
> even after hours of crying my eyes out, i told
> myself, well get yourself
> together, no time to waste, get started with all
> the papers, which all my professors expect a great
> one. You can always write (the heart still remains)
> and the pictures, oh well, allah didn't give us
> memories for nothing. Lela demo men aderek, when i
> got too tired of feeling sorry for myself, i called
> my friends and got everyone together and partied all
> night long. It definitely worked. I got home around 3
> am. Slept woke up early in the morning revived with
> a much better attitude and i've been in the library
> since. It still gets to me when i think of writing
> the papers again or when the idea crosses my mind
> that i may not be able to hand in things on time, gen
> i'm sticking through it. ALLAH ALE AYDEL DEMO! who
> said life is perfect and dandy all the time. Becha
> lemanegnawem, it also means i might need to try to
> get some money to buy a new one - a beautiful new
> one. Leza mitisha be terf se'atesh look around and
> please let me know an average price to get a tight
> ass laptop eshi.
> Beka ... ahun yaw bezu gize yelegnem bemhal bemhal
> sarf and if i have stuff to say ( which i probably
> will) i'll email you my love.
>
> muaa muaaa
> email yet again. Because a new incident has
> happened. Yesterday i had to be separated from
> Genanew. Darling, tamgnalesh, i was doing work in
> the library and i had moved away from my desk for
> what could not have been for more than 10 minutes,
> when i returned someone had stolen genanew and my
> cell phone. There was absolutely nothing that could
> be done. Mitiye, endet tensekseke endaleksku betayi
> atamgnim neber. and surprisingly, after i came to
> Egypt, i've been soo attached to him and he's been
> behaving wonderfully well. and the funny part was
> that i was thinking this only a couple days ago. I
> take him everywhere i go since all the cafe's here
> have internet access. I had put all my Egypt diaries
> in a beautiful order and had been writing a lot. i
> had put all the pictures( thousands of them) from
> Harar, Addis, Egypt. Darling everything… into thin
> air. I couldn't believe such a thing had happened to
> me. and you know i don't get
> attached to anything. but is was not loosing
> something that's material. You know how i never
> really liked him at first right, gen it just had too
> many things in it. this is aside the fact that i
> have five papers to hand in the next ten days and
> i've lost everything. Mitisha nights of research is
> gone. Ahun meseksek yansegnal.
>
> Gen it also made me realize something. Mitisha
> alhamdulilah, allah teru sew adergo fetrognal, i'm
> not kidding mitisha. it's not about being one way or
> another. I realized i had a good heart and i
> realized how thankful I had to be for being blessed
> with it. Mitisha, there was a kid who was sitting
> in front of me, when i was doing work and when i
> realized what happened i started crying and i asked
> if he had seen anyone. He told me no. I was so
> careful not to be rude so i smiled said ok and left.
> Later on was when my friend brought up the idea that
> he might know a lot more than he let out, i never
> for a second suspected him. But that's not what i
> wanted to say. Tenesh keteregagaw bewhala, you know
> what came to mind. i was not angry at the person who
> took it, the first thing was - maybe whoever took it
> was some kid with a lot of problems, maybe he was
> the only one without a laptop among his friends,
> maybe he wanted money for something very important.
> Mitisha andem i never
> thought a negative thing. i was sad that i had lost
> him forever, but i was never angry. when i realized
> this later, betam des yalegn, i was amazed that i
> had actually thought that way. One thing i hate in
> people is when they are constantly suspicious of
> others. endet endemideberegn. when some of the
> American kids ask me to watch their belongings to go
> to the bathroom or something my reaction is always
> like - wiii enezi demo deros sew mamen mech yawkalu,
> or something like, what now you're in a third world
> country you think everyone is a thief... bla bla
> bla, betam yanadegn neber. Now even though i
> definitely realize how right they are to be careful,
> i also fell in love with my self ( surprise suprise!
> ) for still having faith in other people, for having
> the believe that people are inherently good. No
> matter how unrealistic it may seem for some people
> or crazy, it felt good to believe it. I still do,
> even after hours of crying my eyes out, i told
> myself, well get yourself
> together, no time to waste, get started with all
> the papers, which all my professors expect a great
> one. You can always write (the heart still remains)
> and the pictures, oh well, allah didn't give us
> memories for nothing. Lela demo men aderek, when i
> got too tired of feeling sorry for myself, i called
> my friends and got everyone together and partied all
> night long. It definitely worked. I got home around 3
> am. Slept woke up early in the morning revived with
> a much better attitude and i've been in the library
> since. It still gets to me when i think of writing
> the papers again or when the idea crosses my mind
> that i may not be able to hand in things on time, gen
> i'm sticking through it. ALLAH ALE AYDEL DEMO! who
> said life is perfect and dandy all the time. Becha
> lemanegnawem, it also means i might need to try to
> get some money to buy a new one - a beautiful new
> one. Leza mitisha be terf se'atesh look around and
> please let me know an average price to get a tight
> ass laptop eshi.
> Beka ... ahun yaw bezu gize yelegnem bemhal bemhal
> sarf and if i have stuff to say ( which i probably
> will) i'll email you my love.
>
> muaa muaaa
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 30, 2007
Mitish ... wouwwwwwwwwoouuu lewere kemechekole
yetenesa I can't even go through the proper
selamtawoch ...
Well where should I start? How about the Co
friend? Woy gudddddddddddd ... let's leave the ____
thing aside ina just on the politics. I
admire mitish, I have utmost respect for him. Endet
arif feeling new? To go after one thing
single-mindedly? The Alchemist ... "To realize one's
destiny is a person's only obligation." (Thanks
mitish, I did read it finally and it fell nothing
short of my expectations). What must it feel like? I'm
sure its the most exhilarating feeling. Good for him
... I just hope I have that for myself too ... Darlin
I have to share this poem with you ... yemirgermew I
picked up the book randomly coming back from Boston
... I was bored with the book I took for the bus trip
and just picked this one up coming back and one poem
in particular, I just can't get out of my head.
The Journey
One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice --
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do --
determined to save
the only life you could save.
~ Mary Oliver ~
Des aylim ... esp. the last stanza or whatever it is
they call it ... ' the only life you could save ...'.
Nways, mitish, movin on ... ___ issue. ine inja
mitish, sometimes i just throw my hands up in
frustration and admit that to try to understand the
motives of some people is just futile, even dangerous
sometimes. ho ho feri lenatu biloal yagere sew ... For
example, I read on the news last night that this 11
month baby died in a country in Africa after being raped by a 20
year old? Ahun ihe min yibalal? mitish you know me ...
I TRY not to be emotional at times like these ... n
you're really my only outlet since you can predict
Nafi's reaction to such things. Gin mitish for some
reason this one just beka pierced my heart. It was
beyond anything I could find a rational explanation
for ... I just kept on trying to imagine how she would
probably fit on my one arm, wrapped in a blanket,
tiklil bila tegnita, her eyes barely visible on her
chubby, dibulbul fit. Ayiyyyy bicha movin on ....
Mitish, I guess tilant I had a breakthrough. So
background to the incident first ... [ and ]had been having some problems, you know mainly
because of the stuff I told you last time, about her
having trust and commitment issues minamin. So she
was feeling REALLY down and I volunteered help
. So I called him minamin, the guy is
really nice and decent mitish, really, but more than
that inja mitisha endet biye hula indemasredash
alakim. I asked himn a few questions and told him that she was really worried about him. He
said he's been having personal problems (I've told you
he's from KK right?) ... and I don't know if
you've been following the story but a similar crisis
to a the 14 year incident happening over there at the
moment. Bicha get this ... the way he described it was
" I can't bear to get out of bed for fear of hearing
something about my family ... any second I fear that
I'm going to receive terrible news". WOYEW! which new
yalkut. When he asked if I understood, mitish, honest
hogne I told him that I won't even pretend to BEGIN to
understand what he's going through. And he said the
reason he's been staying away was because
he's been on his own since childhood and he doesn't
deal with his problems by sharing them with people.
Mitiye, min limelis? Sewinete new yezalew ... I mean
it was nothing new , the lady had told me about it
before gin ... hearing it from him mitiye ... I tried
to imagine him, beka, mitish, bezih alem lay powerless
indemehon min bedel ale? eko min? inja ... bicha, i
changed the subject somehow and told him to call her
blah blah and now they're ok. I guess they talked it
out bedenb. So Mich was with me, we were in the
lib, ina I went back to the study room we were in and
SHE started telling me about her bal and her
relationship minamin. And that's I guess where the
breakthrough came. Mitish ... this tough exterior we
all put on, and this is soooooooo true for me, you
know the 'i really don't care' attitude ... I see it
soooo much in her and I asked her outright if she
really believed in it and she admitted that she
didn't. All of us, in our own little, sometimes
foolish ways, are trying to protect our hearts from
the dreaded 'inkit, dikik, bitin!'. Including me. Gin
mindinew yagere sew yalew ... 'hilm teferto, saytegna
aytaderim'. And here i was 'medeleling' myself that,
really, the reason I don't see or date people is cuz
the 'right' person hasn't come along yet. true to some
extent but .... lelawin legizew hod yifjew biyalew. I
feel like we all try to find that perfection in
another individual when in fact that is IMPOSSIBLE,
hoping that another human would feel that gap, the
yearning for wholeness. Frankly mitish, I still don't
where that would come from gin a mere mortal sure as
hell won't do it.
wedishalew. can't wait to read you soon ...
yetenesa I can't even go through the proper
selamtawoch ...
Well where should I start? How about the Co
friend? Woy gudddddddddddd ... let's leave the ____
thing aside ina just on the politics. I
admire mitish, I have utmost respect for him. Endet
arif feeling new? To go after one thing
single-mindedly? The Alchemist ... "To realize one's
destiny is a person's only obligation." (Thanks
mitish, I did read it finally and it fell nothing
short of my expectations). What must it feel like? I'm
sure its the most exhilarating feeling. Good for him
... I just hope I have that for myself too ... Darlin
I have to share this poem with you ... yemirgermew I
picked up the book randomly coming back from Boston
... I was bored with the book I took for the bus trip
and just picked this one up coming back and one poem
in particular, I just can't get out of my head.
The Journey
One day you finally knew
what you had to do, and began,
though the voices around you
kept shouting
their bad advice --
though the whole house
began to tremble
and you felt the old tug
at your ankles.
"Mend my life!"
each voice cried.
But you didn't stop.
You knew what you had to do,
though the wind pried
with its stiff fingers
at the very foundations,
though their melancholy
was terrible.
It was already late
enough, and a wild night,
and the road full of fallen
branches and stones.
But little by little,
as you left their voices behind,
the stars began to burn
through the sheets of clouds,
and there was a new voice
which you slowly
recognized as your own,
that kept you company
as you strode deeper and deeper
into the world,
determined to do
the only thing you could do --
determined to save
the only life you could save.
~ Mary Oliver ~
Des aylim ... esp. the last stanza or whatever it is
they call it ... ' the only life you could save ...'.
Nways, mitish, movin on ... ___ issue. ine inja
mitish, sometimes i just throw my hands up in
frustration and admit that to try to understand the
motives of some people is just futile, even dangerous
sometimes. ho ho feri lenatu biloal yagere sew ... For
example, I read on the news last night that this 11
month baby died in a country in Africa after being raped by a 20
year old? Ahun ihe min yibalal? mitish you know me ...
I TRY not to be emotional at times like these ... n
you're really my only outlet since you can predict
Nafi's reaction to such things. Gin mitish for some
reason this one just beka pierced my heart. It was
beyond anything I could find a rational explanation
for ... I just kept on trying to imagine how she would
probably fit on my one arm, wrapped in a blanket,
tiklil bila tegnita, her eyes barely visible on her
chubby, dibulbul fit. Ayiyyyy bicha movin on ....
Mitish, I guess tilant I had a breakthrough. So
background to the incident first ... [ and ]had been having some problems, you know mainly
because of the stuff I told you last time, about her
having trust and commitment issues minamin. So she
was feeling REALLY down and I volunteered help
. So I called him minamin, the guy is
really nice and decent mitish, really, but more than
that inja mitisha endet biye hula indemasredash
alakim. I asked himn a few questions and told him that she was really worried about him. He
said he's been having personal problems (I've told you
he's from KK right?) ... and I don't know if
you've been following the story but a similar crisis
to a the 14 year incident happening over there at the
moment. Bicha get this ... the way he described it was
" I can't bear to get out of bed for fear of hearing
something about my family ... any second I fear that
I'm going to receive terrible news". WOYEW! which new
yalkut. When he asked if I understood, mitish, honest
hogne I told him that I won't even pretend to BEGIN to
understand what he's going through. And he said the
reason he's been staying away was because
he's been on his own since childhood and he doesn't
deal with his problems by sharing them with people.
Mitiye, min limelis? Sewinete new yezalew ... I mean
it was nothing new , the lady had told me about it
before gin ... hearing it from him mitiye ... I tried
to imagine him, beka, mitish, bezih alem lay powerless
indemehon min bedel ale? eko min? inja ... bicha, i
changed the subject somehow and told him to call her
blah blah and now they're ok. I guess they talked it
out bedenb. So Mich was with me, we were in the
lib, ina I went back to the study room we were in and
SHE started telling me about her bal and her
relationship minamin. And that's I guess where the
breakthrough came. Mitish ... this tough exterior we
all put on, and this is soooooooo true for me, you
know the 'i really don't care' attitude ... I see it
soooo much in her and I asked her outright if she
really believed in it and she admitted that she
didn't. All of us, in our own little, sometimes
foolish ways, are trying to protect our hearts from
the dreaded 'inkit, dikik, bitin!'. Including me. Gin
mindinew yagere sew yalew ... 'hilm teferto, saytegna
aytaderim'. And here i was 'medeleling' myself that,
really, the reason I don't see or date people is cuz
the 'right' person hasn't come along yet. true to some
extent but .... lelawin legizew hod yifjew biyalew. I
feel like we all try to find that perfection in
another individual when in fact that is IMPOSSIBLE,
hoping that another human would feel that gap, the
yearning for wholeness. Frankly mitish, I still don't
where that would come from gin a mere mortal sure as
hell won't do it.
wedishalew. can't wait to read you soon ...
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 30, 2007
> Darlin Darlin Darlin, Endemen alesh. Anchiyesa,
> abedku end? wey gud... becha seletenantenaw, i
> realized it's nothing major, just one of those
> moments were you just start realizing so many things
> and beka take all the weight on your shoulders new
> yemibalew. Becha yaw mead eshi...
> Gen guess what happened after. Yemaregew gera
> gebtogn, i had just figured i'd check my email
> aydel, keza i emailed you.. becka lek after i
> clicked send and signed out of yahoo, this guy whose
> a good friend comes over kewhalaye and i was like oh
> ok he can get my minds off things so i was like hey
> " come and sit outside of the stairs with me" -
> those classic ones where hundreds of kids manage to
> massacre their time and of course realize it not...
> anyhoo ... so we go sit and we're going on and on..
> betam arif awariye new in cairo. So he suggest we go
> have dinner, which we do... like i said he offers me
> one of the best conversations that i can possibly
> expect from Cairo. Endewem tenenesh entertain
> ladergesh and i'll tell you a little big about him,
> and ofcourse a i'll get to the point i wanted to
> mention in the first place.
> This guy went to this college in Phili for about two
> years and he goes home, home being Co, for the
> summer to do an internship. He gets involved
> politically over there cuz he ends up wanting working
> for sort of an important person who does manage to
> get him involved in things. Becha he gets into it,
> that he takes time from school and gets a permanent
> job. He didn't say, but i'm thinking he comes from
> sort of a good family to be able to do all the
> things he was telling me he did. Becha while he was
> there, he actually co-founded a “party” who
> actually has some seats in the “house”. There're very
> active... he's met their president and ... oh you
> know arifenetu, he's such a realist malet. Becka he
> knows he is politician, agul he doesn't bullshit
> around. Betam new yemigermew betay. Even with all
> the classes he takes here, he only chooses ones
> that he's sure he's going to need. this kid is an A
> student but has absolutely no problem in receiving a
> D, which he actually did ones, if
> he feels like the class isn't going to help him in
> being what he wants to be in the future. Betam clear
> headed yehone lij new. He wasn't even blabbering
> zembelo that he was one of the two most young
> influential people in Co. i could totally see
> that in him. He has this very calm appearance, but
> can also talk his mind. He tells you with totally
> conviction that Bush is a great president, cuz he's
> done a lot more for Africa than any other president,
> Clintonema men aderege? ... He's a politician and an
> African one at that. Betam tadenkiw neber. Gen here
> is where the shock kicks in, and it turned out to be
> a great wake up call for me in soo many ways.
> What had happened was, about a week or two ago i
> missed a lot of classes and one of the ones i missed
> was a 400 level class which him and I had once a
> week, i had a paper due that same day, but since i
> didnt' want to go to class, i call him and tell him
> that i'd email my paper to him so that he can give
> it to the professor. He obviously knew i was just
> feeling lousy and in bed, so i just told him i'd
> tell him some other time and never really got around
> to it. Becha during our dinner yesterday he asks me,
> yaw enen tawkignalesh, i'd forgotten about
> everything, gen for many reason i end up telling him
> about Omer and how afterwards i felt like i'd
> stepped to low bla bla bla... so this starts of the
> relationship talk right... becha while we were going
> back and forth with relationships and politics and
> amazingly manages to put the two together. I ask him
> if he was keeping himself clean, in all the possible
> sense of the word, so that if he someday did decides
> to run for
> presidency, which i honestly believe he can and he
> will, people wouldn't have a dirty story to pull on
> him. Well being the politician that he is, he's
> already thought of all this stuff and he was like -
> actually i'm very clean right now, but i hadn't been
> for a very long time, and he just figured if they
> ever did pull anything out he can just bullshit and
> say he was young and fullish ( he's around 25 or so,
> cuz after doing the internship in co for about 3
> , which was after philli, was when he decided to go
> back to school at AUC. He does a lot of work while
> he's not in school... Anyhoo i was like what's the
> dirty story.
[ GREAT PART EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]
> Becka yehen hulu sa'at afen kefeche new
> yemesemalesh, gud gud gud eyalkugn. ena, we ended up
> talking about soo many things til soo late and
> he just put so many things in perspective, actually,
> what he did was sort of gave me a reality check. Cuz
> a bunch of Drama had been happening and
> all their group ( not important to mention now
> of course) gen baka he got me in such a good mood
> afterwards. Becka i imagined going to Co in 10
> years time to witness a presidency election he'd be
> running for, seriously. Arif mata neber eleshalew.
> Wiwi daling entertainment saybekash aykerem :) ...
> i better get back to work. there was a bunch of
> other stuff i wanted to talk about gen i think i'll
> drop it for now and do it some other time eshi yene
> feker. Beka hear u soon darling mua mua mua
>
> abedku end? wey gud... becha seletenantenaw, i
> realized it's nothing major, just one of those
> moments were you just start realizing so many things
> and beka take all the weight on your shoulders new
> yemibalew. Becha yaw mead eshi...
> Gen guess what happened after. Yemaregew gera
> gebtogn, i had just figured i'd check my email
> aydel, keza i emailed you.. becka lek after i
> clicked send and signed out of yahoo, this guy whose
> a good friend comes over kewhalaye and i was like oh
> ok he can get my minds off things so i was like hey
> " come and sit outside of the stairs with me" -
> those classic ones where hundreds of kids manage to
> massacre their time and of course realize it not...
> anyhoo ... so we go sit and we're going on and on..
> betam arif awariye new in cairo. So he suggest we go
> have dinner, which we do... like i said he offers me
> one of the best conversations that i can possibly
> expect from Cairo. Endewem tenenesh entertain
> ladergesh and i'll tell you a little big about him,
> and ofcourse a i'll get to the point i wanted to
> mention in the first place.
> This guy went to this college in Phili for about two
> years and he goes home, home being Co, for the
> summer to do an internship. He gets involved
> politically over there cuz he ends up wanting working
> for sort of an important person who does manage to
> get him involved in things. Becha he gets into it,
> that he takes time from school and gets a permanent
> job. He didn't say, but i'm thinking he comes from
> sort of a good family to be able to do all the
> things he was telling me he did. Becha while he was
> there, he actually co-founded a “party” who
> actually has some seats in the “house”. There're very
> active... he's met their president and ... oh you
> know arifenetu, he's such a realist malet. Becka he
> knows he is politician, agul he doesn't bullshit
> around. Betam new yemigermew betay. Even with all
> the classes he takes here, he only chooses ones
> that he's sure he's going to need. this kid is an A
> student but has absolutely no problem in receiving a
> D, which he actually did ones, if
> he feels like the class isn't going to help him in
> being what he wants to be in the future. Betam clear
> headed yehone lij new. He wasn't even blabbering
> zembelo that he was one of the two most young
> influential people in Co. i could totally see
> that in him. He has this very calm appearance, but
> can also talk his mind. He tells you with totally
> conviction that Bush is a great president, cuz he's
> done a lot more for Africa than any other president,
> Clintonema men aderege? ... He's a politician and an
> African one at that. Betam tadenkiw neber. Gen here
> is where the shock kicks in, and it turned out to be
> a great wake up call for me in soo many ways.
> What had happened was, about a week or two ago i
> missed a lot of classes and one of the ones i missed
> was a 400 level class which him and I had once a
> week, i had a paper due that same day, but since i
> didnt' want to go to class, i call him and tell him
> that i'd email my paper to him so that he can give
> it to the professor. He obviously knew i was just
> feeling lousy and in bed, so i just told him i'd
> tell him some other time and never really got around
> to it. Becha during our dinner yesterday he asks me,
> yaw enen tawkignalesh, i'd forgotten about
> everything, gen for many reason i end up telling him
> about Omer and how afterwards i felt like i'd
> stepped to low bla bla bla... so this starts of the
> relationship talk right... becha while we were going
> back and forth with relationships and politics and
> amazingly manages to put the two together. I ask him
> if he was keeping himself clean, in all the possible
> sense of the word, so that if he someday did decides
> to run for
> presidency, which i honestly believe he can and he
> will, people wouldn't have a dirty story to pull on
> him. Well being the politician that he is, he's
> already thought of all this stuff and he was like -
> actually i'm very clean right now, but i hadn't been
> for a very long time, and he just figured if they
> ever did pull anything out he can just bullshit and
> say he was young and fullish ( he's around 25 or so,
> cuz after doing the internship in co for about 3
> , which was after philli, was when he decided to go
> back to school at AUC. He does a lot of work while
> he's not in school... Anyhoo i was like what's the
> dirty story.
[ GREAT PART EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]
> Becka yehen hulu sa'at afen kefeche new
> yemesemalesh, gud gud gud eyalkugn. ena, we ended up
> talking about soo many things til soo late and
> he just put so many things in perspective, actually,
> what he did was sort of gave me a reality check. Cuz
> a bunch of Drama had been happening and
> all their group ( not important to mention now
> of course) gen baka he got me in such a good mood
> afterwards. Becka i imagined going to Co in 10
> years time to witness a presidency election he'd be
> running for, seriously. Arif mata neber eleshalew.
> Wiwi daling entertainment saybekash aykerem :) ...
> i better get back to work. there was a bunch of
> other stuff i wanted to talk about gen i think i'll
> drop it for now and do it some other time eshi yene
> feker. Beka hear u soon darling mua mua mua
>
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 2007
For the Anniversary of My Death
Every year without knowing it I have passed the day
When the last fires will wave to me
And the silence will set out
Tireless traveler
Like the beam of a lightless star
Then I will no longer
Find myself in life as in a strange garment
Surprised at the earth
And the love of one woman
And the shamelessness of men
As today writing after three days of rain
Hearing the wren sing and the falling cease
And bowing not knowing to what
W.S. Merwin
Every year without knowing it I have passed the day
When the last fires will wave to me
And the silence will set out
Tireless traveler
Like the beam of a lightless star
Then I will no longer
Find myself in life as in a strange garment
Surprised at the earth
And the love of one woman
And the shamelessness of men
As today writing after three days of rain
Hearing the wren sing and the falling cease
And bowing not knowing to what
W.S. Merwin
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 2007
> Mitisha, Selamtaw lelela gize i have sooo much to
> write so i'll get right down to it.
>
> I just had the most .. confusing ( just cuz of
> lack of a word) talk with this professor. It
> was nothing different. But for some reason... welayi
> i don't know... it was one of those things that has
> absolutely no explanation, if you were there i'm sure
> you'd be.. what are you talking about.
> Anyhoo... i went into his office cuz i needed some
> help with my arabic. After a few minutes, i realized
> i actually did understand what i went in for so i
> was like.. oh ok, i really don't have much to ask
> you ( actually the real reason i went in was cuz i
> had been missing a lot of classes so i figured yeje
> tenesh bekabed bewere aygodam beye..) so we just
> started talking about random stuff and he was, i'm
> sure practicing his english with me too. Becha he
> started telling me how he wants to leave this
> country... and a lot of other very serious stuff. i
> had a lot to say, gen i was more concentrated on
> using simple English and talking slowly that i
> didn't really say any techebach thing. Becha the
> whole time... all i'm noticing is that words are
> being said but nothing much is being said... betam
> gera megabat yazkulesh. I'm sure he wanted to keep
> talking... but after talking for about one hour i
> said i had to leave, when in fact i had nowhere to go
> and just walked over here to
> the library to, once again, put forward words to
> you and still not make much sense... does it make
> sense? ....
>
> Welayi, i just posed for a few minutes even now to
> understand it... even though the weirdness of it all
> is still very unclear to me, why don't i tell you
> some things we talked about.... wiiii Ya allah,
> yeker lakum eshi.... wiii endet kebatari hognalew
> ...
>
> Weynee beza lay, there is some other thing i'm
> dealing with..
>
> wiiii beza lay there is something i need your
> opinion on...
>
> Wiiii darling lemot new ende bey chaw... i'm going
> to go get some fresh air.... Weyne gude...
>
> write so i'll get right down to it.
>
> I just had the most .. confusing ( just cuz of
> lack of a word) talk with this professor. It
> was nothing different. But for some reason... welayi
> i don't know... it was one of those things that has
> absolutely no explanation, if you were there i'm sure
> you'd be.. what are you talking about.
> Anyhoo... i went into his office cuz i needed some
> help with my arabic. After a few minutes, i realized
> i actually did understand what i went in for so i
> was like.. oh ok, i really don't have much to ask
> you ( actually the real reason i went in was cuz i
> had been missing a lot of classes so i figured yeje
> tenesh bekabed bewere aygodam beye..) so we just
> started talking about random stuff and he was, i'm
> sure practicing his english with me too. Becha he
> started telling me how he wants to leave this
> country... and a lot of other very serious stuff. i
> had a lot to say, gen i was more concentrated on
> using simple English and talking slowly that i
> didn't really say any techebach thing. Becha the
> whole time... all i'm noticing is that words are
> being said but nothing much is being said... betam
> gera megabat yazkulesh. I'm sure he wanted to keep
> talking... but after talking for about one hour i
> said i had to leave, when in fact i had nowhere to go
> and just walked over here to
> the library to, once again, put forward words to
> you and still not make much sense... does it make
> sense? ....
>
> Welayi, i just posed for a few minutes even now to
> understand it... even though the weirdness of it all
> is still very unclear to me, why don't i tell you
> some things we talked about.... wiiii Ya allah,
> yeker lakum eshi.... wiii endet kebatari hognalew
> ...
>
> Weynee beza lay, there is some other thing i'm
> dealing with..
>
> wiiii beza lay there is something i need your
> opinion on...
>
> Wiiii darling lemot new ende bey chaw... i'm going
> to go get some fresh air.... Weyne gude...
>
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 28?2007
Mitiye, yene wud, mindinew negeru? r u ok? i have to
run to class so can't say much ... although dunno what
i would say even if i had the time ... ur email was
ummmm 'alarming' for lack of a better word. if you're
going through one of those spells when not much makes
sense for the moment ... its alright, those moments of
confusion and 'weirdness' are what after all make us
humans. Gin darlin, i don't care if you have a twenty
page paper due by midnight, please, take a moment,
breathe and write back.
run to class so can't say much ... although dunno what
i would say even if i had the time ... ur email was
ummmm 'alarming' for lack of a better word. if you're
going through one of those spells when not much makes
sense for the moment ... its alright, those moments of
confusion and 'weirdness' are what after all make us
humans. Gin darlin, i don't care if you have a twenty
page paper due by midnight, please, take a moment,
breathe and write back.
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 2007
> Yene alegnta! beye lejemer neber gen kasebkut> bewhala, "alegnta" men malet endehone endemalwlk tez> alegn!!! Abedku?!? Andande amaregna kaloch ten belew> eko new yemitefut...> Leza yene feker, i'm sitting the floor of one of> the buildings here at AUC waitin for my arabic class> to start. I'm here about an hour early since i am> unable to write a 7 page paper which is due in 10> hours and which i still have not started. Enkelf> yadafagnal, berdu demo ligelegn new! WUff alkugnena> lemen hulu neger gedel aygebam beye i figured i> should write you until my class starts or possibly> until my battery dies. Enem befinaye, i was away for> thanksgiving break, that's why i just got your email> this morning. I arrived back here in cairo this> morning and took a shower and just left to my> classes and this is after a 12 hour train ride.> Mechem allah tenekarewen yestegn. It was a very> relaxing trip tho. We took a train to Aswan ( google> please!) and then once we got there we took a boat> up to Laxur. We stayed on the boat for 4 days ( sort> of a cruise) and we stopped at all the places with> historical sites to see... ayiii yi... yehenenem> yalaye Axum alen yelal! Mitisha,> their Ancient civilization, beka af new> yemiyaskefetew. Becha enem yaw i won't bore you with> all the details all in all gen, it was very relaxing> and fun. > Men addis neger ale meselesh. Even though i still> have not said anything, is that i have> decided against visiting all the places we were> suppose to visit ( darlin le visa meruaruat akemum> yelegnem) and have decided to go to Qatar. She is due to fly there on Thursday. So i figured> i'll go over there for about 10 days and spend it> iwth her - possibly help her out with a few things> and i don't think getting a visa over there is hard> at all. ene ke egzer gar endeza new eleshalew...> Mitisha atamgnignem, enkelfe endet eyadafagn> endehone yegermeshal eshi. Mutet beyalew.... becha> let me try to forget about it, beza lay demo i'm> wearing a T-shirt which is horable for this weather..> ende Berd Cariom teketelogn meta ende!?!?!?> Wey ye harverdu goremsa. By the way you never> did mention his name eko.> cheger eko new ... mitisha sele wendes neger> balanesa sayeshal aykerem. i feel like i've changed> a lot after Addis and especially after Cairo....> i've been thinking a lot about it all... a lot.> Wereyen i'd prefer to save it for some other day, gen> i think i can finally say, i'm ready for a> relationship. Does that make sense? Do you believe> me? > I'm sure this email is long overdue, and i'm> sure you're ready to get back to classes. Hope> your "alone" feeling is disappearing. I honestly> thought, my staring into you and n's face> every single morning on my laptop, would take all of> that "alone" feeling away from you. And this is even> aside from the fact, as corny as it sounds, i'm> always there with, betamgnim batamgnim. Darling,> i'll email you hopefully after i finish my paper,> which should miraculously should be in 10 hours.> muaaaaa.... bey bedemb temarilen. muuaaaa> >
From Feker to Rihana - Nov (last) 2007
Mitiye anjete, kulalite, mare ... (have you noticed
how Amharic terms of endearment are either food or
body organ related ... hmmm)
First off, I have to warn you that this email might
sound depressed cause that is the state I'm in right
now ... simply CANNOT focus on work and its pissing me
off. I need to take my mind off of that so here goes
... my attempt to describe a relaxing break in Jupiter
in such a mood. (by the by I was over there with S
and family)
Mitish, the break was excellent blah blah blah but of
course I won't bore you with details. Just one thing
though ... at the Thanks giving dinner hosted at
G’s place in the Jupiter. there were these other
kids invited as well. I recognized the two, they had
gone to my elementary School minamin but the third one was
this guy, he was from Ethiopia doing his
master's at Harvard. Bicha mitisha, my faith in
actually settling down with an Ethiopian guy was
restored eilishalew. I mean G had told me about
him, she had gone on and on about how smart he was
(duh ... lol)but above that how he would listen to
every argument she had to make, however silly. So we
were all sitting around and talking about politics
(what else for habeshoch?) and mitisha I was seriously
beka impressed. EVERYONE was emotional, misguided,
downright rude sometimes but he ... wouuuuuwwwouuu ...
he would somehow stir the conversation back to the
issue and talk so calmly and confidently and just make
you feel lucky you were in his presence. And I said
... yup ... that's what I want. At first I thought it
was the Harvard 'sim' ... but not really mitisha.
Beka, nothing absolutely NOTHING attracts me to a guy
more than his mind. Wey tata mitisha and imagine
seeing all that 'chinkilat' in a habesha guy?? Not to
diss my habesha men, and yeah of course there is the
'tiru lib' part also gin .... i was just blown away
mitish. Yemiyasazinew, I probably heard him talk for
10 minutes but I've already put him on a pedestal ...
cause it has ceased being about him but 'sewiyew' ...
and mitish ... that elusive sewiye has to resemble
this man and what i've added to his existing qualities
in my silly little head ...
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH mitish, how fickle
human being are gin! I came back yesterday all pumped
to do work over the weekend so as to not feel guilty
about partying over the whole break gin min yaregal
... computer kifit, ayn fitit! Mitish as much as I
love my solitude, sometimes, just for a fraction of a
second it hits me that I am alone, different from
lonely, and its like this piercing realization that
maybe I've been wrong all along, this obsession with
protecting my heart from all sorts of heart, never let
anyone near enough to actually have that power over
you. That is an open question mitiye. I was talking to
this girl over the weekend who, woyew mitiye, was so
obviously scarred over her previous relationship with
her ex. She said ... she envied me cause I still had
that innocence air about me ... that now I'm actually
mature enough to handle the heartache ... she said she
was hurt real bad. Saron as well said that she just
doesn't trust people anymore ... Coming back to moi,
dunno mitiye. I think for the most part, the reason I
refrained from relationships was cause I was
sooooooooooooooo scared of mediocrity. (lol major
Scott flashback moment ... I think I wrote something
about this to him as well) bicha mequacha yelelew
merrygoaround ...
darling ... yibkagn ... i feel drained and depressed
and tikusatam ... i'll tell you how its gonna work out
gin a possible internship opp. in boston for j-term
has presented itself. esti write back my darling ...
me misses your wisdomfullness self. wedishalew.
how Amharic terms of endearment are either food or
body organ related ... hmmm)
First off, I have to warn you that this email might
sound depressed cause that is the state I'm in right
now ... simply CANNOT focus on work and its pissing me
off. I need to take my mind off of that so here goes
... my attempt to describe a relaxing break in Jupiter
in such a mood. (by the by I was over there with S
and family)
Mitish, the break was excellent blah blah blah but of
course I won't bore you with details. Just one thing
though ... at the Thanks giving dinner hosted at
G’s place in the Jupiter. there were these other
kids invited as well. I recognized the two, they had
gone to my elementary School minamin but the third one was
this guy, he was from Ethiopia doing his
master's at Harvard. Bicha mitisha, my faith in
actually settling down with an Ethiopian guy was
restored eilishalew. I mean G had told me about
him, she had gone on and on about how smart he was
(duh ... lol)but above that how he would listen to
every argument she had to make, however silly. So we
were all sitting around and talking about politics
(what else for habeshoch?) and mitisha I was seriously
beka impressed. EVERYONE was emotional, misguided,
downright rude sometimes but he ... wouuuuuwwwouuu ...
he would somehow stir the conversation back to the
issue and talk so calmly and confidently and just make
you feel lucky you were in his presence. And I said
... yup ... that's what I want. At first I thought it
was the Harvard 'sim' ... but not really mitisha.
Beka, nothing absolutely NOTHING attracts me to a guy
more than his mind. Wey tata mitisha and imagine
seeing all that 'chinkilat' in a habesha guy?? Not to
diss my habesha men, and yeah of course there is the
'tiru lib' part also gin .... i was just blown away
mitish. Yemiyasazinew, I probably heard him talk for
10 minutes but I've already put him on a pedestal ...
cause it has ceased being about him but 'sewiyew' ...
and mitish ... that elusive sewiye has to resemble
this man and what i've added to his existing qualities
in my silly little head ...
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH mitish, how fickle
human being are gin! I came back yesterday all pumped
to do work over the weekend so as to not feel guilty
about partying over the whole break gin min yaregal
... computer kifit, ayn fitit! Mitish as much as I
love my solitude, sometimes, just for a fraction of a
second it hits me that I am alone, different from
lonely, and its like this piercing realization that
maybe I've been wrong all along, this obsession with
protecting my heart from all sorts of heart, never let
anyone near enough to actually have that power over
you. That is an open question mitiye. I was talking to
this girl over the weekend who, woyew mitiye, was so
obviously scarred over her previous relationship with
her ex. She said ... she envied me cause I still had
that innocence air about me ... that now I'm actually
mature enough to handle the heartache ... she said she
was hurt real bad. Saron as well said that she just
doesn't trust people anymore ... Coming back to moi,
dunno mitiye. I think for the most part, the reason I
refrained from relationships was cause I was
sooooooooooooooo scared of mediocrity. (lol major
Scott flashback moment ... I think I wrote something
about this to him as well) bicha mequacha yelelew
merrygoaround ...
darling ... yibkagn ... i feel drained and depressed
and tikusatam ... i'll tell you how its gonna work out
gin a possible internship opp. in boston for j-term
has presented itself. esti write back my darling ...
me misses your wisdomfullness self. wedishalew.
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 24, 2008
[ MANY PARTS EXCLUDED BECAUSE OF LACK OF SENSE]
> yene feker, yene wud, i'll apologize first hand if
> my email is filled with negativity. I"m sitting on
> the steps infront of the library, where hundreds of
> mostly Egyptian students. It's
> the weekend, therefore i'm the only one sitting on
> steps which normally is more crowded than the cairo
> street themselves.
> Mitisha, beka mokerk mokerku alchalkum.
I want my life back!!!!!!!!!!!! it's just
> ruining everything. I have two papers i have to hand
> in by monday, i'm just sooo bothered about what is
> happening that i can't even get my head straight
> enough to actually write it. Men endenekagn alawkem
>
> Besotoche teterakmew seleneber ena beschit beye
> seleneber my first reaction to all the habeshas
> being with people other race was - gedel yegbuwa... mengedun cherk yargelachew....
> neber but now i'm trying to cool down and get back
> to my head....you're right it's sad, especially
> considering the type of men they are ( yeah my head
> is not fully back enough to care about the women ...
> mengedun cherk yargelachew... ahunem) gen i was just
> thinking, ahun teneshun can you emagine him being
> with a "typical habesha" ... i don't wanna judge
> since i don't know a lot of habesha women in the
> states, but still i don't know... gen demo you know
> what agu said to me when i told him i liked smart
> men he said " make sure to never forget that the
> heart is what matters most" ... Bunch of bullshit...
> why the heck would i care... deros leb yelegn...
> abren gedele engeba yehonal ke mamo gar... wiii
> mendenew yemikebaterew..... back to my point (
> wanawen lela ken) allah abruachew
> yihun... raseshes bethogni would you be with any
> one of those men?! wiiii mitisha .... i need to
> figure something out... my frustration is killing
> me...
>
> yan dengay ras scientists... yeah i read the
> article when it came out, mitisha i have too many
> things to say about that... i'll keep it for
> some other time... i swear to you with all my life,
> with anything, mitisha, welayi, life is a game, we
> think it's so important, so much, we have the dos
> and don’ts bla bla bla, it's all a bunch of bullshit...
> there is someone up there going... " yeah,
> mesluachula" ... it's pointless.... seriously, even
> realizing the fact that history repeats itself
> should be a hint that we are the most insignificant
> beings, we just think we're all that, and millions
> of us die each day never realizing it.... oh shit
> mitisha... muy computer just almost shut down... i
> better send this before it actually does ... i'll
> email you with a better head on my shoulder...
> yene feker, yene wud, i'll apologize first hand if
> my email is filled with negativity. I"m sitting on
> the steps infront of the library, where hundreds of
> mostly Egyptian students. It's
> the weekend, therefore i'm the only one sitting on
> steps which normally is more crowded than the cairo
> street themselves.
> Mitisha, beka mokerk mokerku alchalkum.
I want my life back!!!!!!!!!!!! it's just
> ruining everything. I have two papers i have to hand
> in by monday, i'm just sooo bothered about what is
> happening that i can't even get my head straight
> enough to actually write it. Men endenekagn alawkem
>
> Besotoche teterakmew seleneber ena beschit beye
> seleneber my first reaction to all the habeshas
> being with people other race was - gedel yegbuwa... mengedun cherk yargelachew....
> neber but now i'm trying to cool down and get back
> to my head....you're right it's sad, especially
> considering the type of men they are ( yeah my head
> is not fully back enough to care about the women ...
> mengedun cherk yargelachew... ahunem) gen i was just
> thinking, ahun teneshun can you emagine him being
> with a "typical habesha" ... i don't wanna judge
> since i don't know a lot of habesha women in the
> states, but still i don't know... gen demo you know
> what agu said to me when i told him i liked smart
> men he said " make sure to never forget that the
> heart is what matters most" ... Bunch of bullshit...
> why the heck would i care... deros leb yelegn...
> abren gedele engeba yehonal ke mamo gar... wiii
> mendenew yemikebaterew..... back to my point (
> wanawen lela ken) allah abruachew
> yihun... raseshes bethogni would you be with any
> one of those men?! wiiii mitisha .... i need to
> figure something out... my frustration is killing
> me...
>
> yan dengay ras scientists... yeah i read the
> article when it came out, mitisha i have too many
> things to say about that... i'll keep it for
> some other time... i swear to you with all my life,
> with anything, mitisha, welayi, life is a game, we
> think it's so important, so much, we have the dos
> and don’ts bla bla bla, it's all a bunch of bullshit...
> there is someone up there going... " yeah,
> mesluachula" ... it's pointless.... seriously, even
> realizing the fact that history repeats itself
> should be a hint that we are the most insignificant
> beings, we just think we're all that, and millions
> of us die each day never realizing it.... oh shit
> mitisha... muy computer just almost shut down... i
> better send this before it actually does ... i'll
> email you with a better head on my shoulder...
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 18, 2007
Mitiye,
Ewnetim anchi lij yelibe tirita litihogni minim
alkereshem. Its like I keep a checklist of things to
vent about especially for you, dear friend. Mitish,
this past week has been ... umm ... interesting, for
lack of a better word. I saw a documentary 'Black
Gold' , amazing work by the way, about Ethiopian
coffee and the world market. Mitish woyneeeeeeeee the
film did such a good job of contrasting the average
farmer in Ethiopia, dirt poor, and the starbucks
tetekamioch here in the U.S. Wey mitish ... beka inja
you'd simply be amazed by human being and our ability
to exist in an 'alayehum alsemahum' state ... the
companies were not even willing to give interviews ...
ende ... min lilu? Bicha that got me thinking about a
lot of things we talked about earlier as well ... you
know on development. Sometimes you feel like you'd
just end up another drop in the ocean, an idealist
trying to combat the horrific problems of this world.
But then sometimes, you sort of gaze into the future,
and you see yourself in your mundane existence and
you're jolted right back to where you are; an idealist
but a content one at least. I was talking to your
uncle today ina mitish he also said the same thing ...
he was saying how he looks at his students who come to
him and cry about the ONE requirement they REALLY
REALLY don't want to take for graduation and how
unfair the world is because of that blah blah blah ...
and he was just like "I compare this to REAL problems
back home and sometimes I wish I had involved myself
in a career" and these were his exact words "which I
can actually bring a change in someone's life". Beka,
very simply put and yet so profound mitisha. ...
wouuouuuuuuuuuuu yibkagn mitish I could literally go
on forever ...
Darling, I recently read this article which was
talking about how in a thousand years humanity will be
divided into two races, one which will be beautiful,
tall, thin and intelligent while the others will
evolve into short, ugly and mentally slow species
whose sole existence will be to serve the superior
race. And then there was this scientist who by the way
had won the Nobel Prize in the past, declared that the
reason policies are not working in Africa was because
the western world considered the Black race its equal.
In his opinion, Blacks are less intelligent and by
considering them our equals, we were actually hurting
them. He also said if we wanted proof of this to ask
people who had black employees. And so there was a
huge uproar and he was banned from giving a talk in
London blah blah ... Mitish, when I read this beka I
can't even begin to explain how I felt. This is a
scientist eko for goodness sake and he he's a
PROFESSOR at some big shot university in New York,
Columbia or NYU ... dunno ... gin beka inja ... the
world yasferal mitish ... betam betam ... Can you
imagine how many impressionable minds he can actually
convince of his theory ... who was it that said the
only sure thing is that history will keep on repeating
itself? ay mitisha ... ahun ahunish I'm starting to
believe that ....
[ discussion of interracial marriage too place here – chose to exclude it for the privacy of others ]
... like you
said yegnanis man awekew gin isn't it just amazingly,
freakishly sad and weird? Degmo miyasikew inezih
lijoch ... how do you say it, "cream of the crop
mehonachew" ... mitiye ... inja I'm feeling really
weird ... yiyyyyyyyyyyyy i wish you were here. There
days when things just don't make sense ... at all ...
... good luck on
work ... read you soon. wedishalew.
--- Rihana Nesrudin wrote:
>
Ewnetim anchi lij yelibe tirita litihogni minim
alkereshem. Its like I keep a checklist of things to
vent about especially for you, dear friend. Mitish,
this past week has been ... umm ... interesting, for
lack of a better word. I saw a documentary 'Black
Gold' , amazing work by the way, about Ethiopian
coffee and the world market. Mitish woyneeeeeeeee the
film did such a good job of contrasting the average
farmer in Ethiopia, dirt poor, and the starbucks
tetekamioch here in the U.S. Wey mitish ... beka inja
you'd simply be amazed by human being and our ability
to exist in an 'alayehum alsemahum' state ... the
companies were not even willing to give interviews ...
ende ... min lilu? Bicha that got me thinking about a
lot of things we talked about earlier as well ... you
know on development. Sometimes you feel like you'd
just end up another drop in the ocean, an idealist
trying to combat the horrific problems of this world.
But then sometimes, you sort of gaze into the future,
and you see yourself in your mundane existence and
you're jolted right back to where you are; an idealist
but a content one at least. I was talking to your
uncle today ina mitish he also said the same thing ...
he was saying how he looks at his students who come to
him and cry about the ONE requirement they REALLY
REALLY don't want to take for graduation and how
unfair the world is because of that blah blah blah ...
and he was just like "I compare this to REAL problems
back home and sometimes I wish I had involved myself
in a career" and these were his exact words "which I
can actually bring a change in someone's life". Beka,
very simply put and yet so profound mitisha. ...
wouuouuuuuuuuuuu yibkagn mitish I could literally go
on forever ...
Darling, I recently read this article which was
talking about how in a thousand years humanity will be
divided into two races, one which will be beautiful,
tall, thin and intelligent while the others will
evolve into short, ugly and mentally slow species
whose sole existence will be to serve the superior
race. And then there was this scientist who by the way
had won the Nobel Prize in the past, declared that the
reason policies are not working in Africa was because
the western world considered the Black race its equal.
In his opinion, Blacks are less intelligent and by
considering them our equals, we were actually hurting
them. He also said if we wanted proof of this to ask
people who had black employees. And so there was a
huge uproar and he was banned from giving a talk in
London blah blah ... Mitish, when I read this beka I
can't even begin to explain how I felt. This is a
scientist eko for goodness sake and he he's a
PROFESSOR at some big shot university in New York,
Columbia or NYU ... dunno ... gin beka inja ... the
world yasferal mitish ... betam betam ... Can you
imagine how many impressionable minds he can actually
convince of his theory ... who was it that said the
only sure thing is that history will keep on repeating
itself? ay mitisha ... ahun ahunish I'm starting to
believe that ....
[ discussion of interracial marriage too place here – chose to exclude it for the privacy of others ]
... like you
said yegnanis man awekew gin isn't it just amazingly,
freakishly sad and weird? Degmo miyasikew inezih
lijoch ... how do you say it, "cream of the crop
mehonachew" ... mitiye ... inja I'm feeling really
weird ... yiyyyyyyyyyyyy i wish you were here. There
days when things just don't make sense ... at all ...
... good luck on
work ... read you soon. wedishalew.
--- Rihana Nesrudin
>
From Rihana to Feker - Nove 8, 2007
> Darlin, finally :)
>
> I'm simply typing, eshi, i'm not necessarily
> replying to your email. Wey gud, Relationships....
> koy koy, let me tell you what i did today
>
> [ A LONG DISCUSSION ON ISSUES OF PRIVACY EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]
> Wedefit rasu mitisha i don't know what i'm going
> to do. right now, i'm being honest, at the same time
> showing my hypocrisy - unless i get engaged soon or
> something, i think i'm not suppose to date. If i do,
> well, something is going to be the inevitable. It breaks my
> heart to say this... i don't even want to think
> it... there’s so much i want to tell you darlin, i
> can't wait til i get back and do so... gen the
> point... either get married or not date. If i choose
> the later, well...
>
>
>
> ... Mitiye, relationships... i don't even know how
> to put it. I've started understanding a few things
> recently... relationships are absolutely not related
> to what we imagine them to be. They are so simple
> and so complicated at the same time. I can easily
> imagine myself being in one, but yet i can't...yi yi
> yeker ... M rasua, ahun men yeshalal libal new
> yeswa neger... ene enja. zares mitisha negeroch
> betam gera gebtewegnal...
>
> darlin, ke yekerta ger endewem bakom sayeshalegn
> aykerem... i'm also not feeling so great physically.
> So i'll save the rest for tomorrow... eshi yene
> feker... wedeshalew...
>
>
> I'm simply typing, eshi, i'm not necessarily
> replying to your email. Wey gud, Relationships....
> koy koy, let me tell you what i did today
>
> [ A LONG DISCUSSION ON ISSUES OF PRIVACY EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]
> Wedefit rasu mitisha i don't know what i'm going
> to do. right now, i'm being honest, at the same time
> showing my hypocrisy - unless i get engaged soon or
> something, i think i'm not suppose to date. If i do,
> well, something is going to be the inevitable. It breaks my
> heart to say this... i don't even want to think
> it... there’s so much i want to tell you darlin, i
> can't wait til i get back and do so... gen the
> point... either get married or not date. If i choose
> the later, well...
>
>
>
> ... Mitiye, relationships... i don't even know how
> to put it. I've started understanding a few things
> recently... relationships are absolutely not related
> to what we imagine them to be. They are so simple
> and so complicated at the same time. I can easily
> imagine myself being in one, but yet i can't...yi yi
> yeker ... M rasua, ahun men yeshalal libal new
> yeswa neger... ene enja. zares mitisha negeroch
> betam gera gebtewegnal...
>
> darlin, ke yekerta ger endewem bakom sayeshalegn
> aykerem... i'm also not feeling so great physically.
> So i'll save the rest for tomorrow... eshi yene
> feker... wedeshalew...
>
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 2007
My dearest darlin,
endet kermeshilignal? i know this email is long
overdue but really couldn't help it. Degmo eko bizu
kum neger iyetesera aymiselish, time has never been on
my side since I stepped foot in this country(as I'm
sure you understand).
Anyhoo, how've you been? My GOD! Beka yanchim memcha
eko iyederese new ... wouuuuouuuuuu sigerim benatish.
Its just so weird. I can't believe we're already
registering for spring semester. bicha zim zim new ...
silesus anansa.
Darlin, it was soooooooooo weird that you had to
email me about those internship opportunities in west
Africa last time cause I've been meaning to email and
pour my heart out about a pet project I had in mind.
More about mine later ... Its really great mitisha. I
hope betaaaaaaaaaaaaam that it works out mitiye cause
at the end of the day yegna class wust banebebnew
neger mazen mechenek is going to solve nada. I do
believe that is the best kind of exposure. When I
went to Uganda last summer I actually wished that
Henock wasn't there because I wanted to experience it
all and of course you're right by now we're sounding
like all those nech girls we mock. Gin mitisha, minim
chikichik yelelew fact new, if we don't involve
ourselves like this I don't feel like any substantial
changes will come about. So darlin, by all means, go
ahead and try to land yourself something around there.
We'll work on the proposal isu its not a problem and
[ MORE CURRIER IDEAS DISCUSSED – FISTULA?]
Mitish, I've come to realize inde history lesew
lijoch important yehone timirt yelem. Whenever you
look back on human history, what we've achieved, what
we've brought on ourselves, human nature just
fascinates me. Prof. Hashmi asked the class last time
who we would consider the most charismatic leader of
the 20th century and this girl actually said Hitler.
At the time I was shocked is a gross understatement.
But he explained and it makes so
much sense. Hitler was able to convince people that
the death of 6 million Jews was justified. And then we
see these same people committing the same crimes on
Palestinians today, and thousands are dying in Darfur.
The same shit happens over and over and
overrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr again and yet we haven't changed.
Weapons just change their faces and we keep on coming
up with brand new ways to destroy each other. Another
professor said that the only way ALL human beings will
ever be united was if there was an alien attack from
another planet. Moral of the story? Wasting energy on
how unfair or messed up this world is, solves zilch.
Like you said last time, the best thing we can do is
to work on things we actually have control over and
leave the other stuff to people who are naive enough
to think this thing called human nature is something
that can be tamed, rationalized.
Darlin, ever since you wrote about___,
I've been thinking a lottttttttt about all our
theories revolving around relationships. Mitish, ine
betam kerase realize yarekut neger the idea of a
relationship BORES me to the core. If only I was
'free' like the Moho girls here then I wouldn't feel
so guilty about flings here and there. But I'm not. On
the other hand, mitisha, sewoch 'this is my boyfriend
so and so' bilew sentence sijemiru shimkik new milew.
KELIB. But then of course another problem is that do
we really believe in everlasting love? mitisha, are
we, as humans, even capable of that? ine i don't know
... My Anthro professor said last year to never
confuse longevity with happiness. That is so true eko.
I know the security and companionship that comes along
with it is a necessity gin inja mitisha ... sometimes
living life on the sidelines is pretty amazing. Its
just so damn fascinating ...
Mitish, ene eko i just wonder sometimes how any one
could have that kind of control over us. M for
example I feel is scarred for life because of T.
Mitiye, when I listen to her libe new inkit milew
cause she's reached a conclusion that giving yourself
fully to anyone is not worth cause in her own words
'yane yikebtalu'. And so this new 'relationship' with
TT is doomed from the start because mitisha, she
is forever wary of showing her true feelings. Tadia
ihe min yibalal? ine i don't know what to make of it
... But all I know is mitish there is no sadder site
than to see someone loose their innocence ...
wouwouuuuuuuuuu mitiye lemme not get into that
benatish its just too much.
Darlin onto more practical stuff ... the class I took
at Umass is Economic Development for Post Independent
Africa ... the prof I like and especially cause he
teaches you new theories about the continent. Lelaw,
I'm thinking of taking this class on "The brothers
Karamazov' ... looks like its gonna be interesting
engidih. Beterefe, darlin I miss your emails betam
wouuuy ahunim dimisishim nafkognal endiyawim i'll give
you a call tomorrow. Take good care of yourself, and
especially when you're planning the summer
internships. Minim bihon botaw Africa mehonun atrishi
... guadegna alrekesebignim darlin. Wedishalew.
endet kermeshilignal? i know this email is long
overdue but really couldn't help it. Degmo eko bizu
kum neger iyetesera aymiselish, time has never been on
my side since I stepped foot in this country(as I'm
sure you understand).
Anyhoo, how've you been? My GOD! Beka yanchim memcha
eko iyederese new ... wouuuuouuuuuu sigerim benatish.
Its just so weird. I can't believe we're already
registering for spring semester. bicha zim zim new ...
silesus anansa.
Darlin, it was soooooooooo weird that you had to
email me about those internship opportunities in west
Africa last time cause I've been meaning to email and
pour my heart out about a pet project I had in mind.
More about mine later ... Its really great mitisha. I
hope betaaaaaaaaaaaaam that it works out mitiye cause
at the end of the day yegna class wust banebebnew
neger mazen mechenek is going to solve nada. I do
believe that is the best kind of exposure. When I
went to Uganda last summer I actually wished that
Henock wasn't there because I wanted to experience it
all and of course you're right by now we're sounding
like all those nech girls we mock. Gin mitisha, minim
chikichik yelelew fact new, if we don't involve
ourselves like this I don't feel like any substantial
changes will come about. So darlin, by all means, go
ahead and try to land yourself something around there.
We'll work on the proposal isu its not a problem and
[ MORE CURRIER IDEAS DISCUSSED – FISTULA?]
Mitish, I've come to realize inde history lesew
lijoch important yehone timirt yelem. Whenever you
look back on human history, what we've achieved, what
we've brought on ourselves, human nature just
fascinates me. Prof. Hashmi asked the class last time
who we would consider the most charismatic leader of
the 20th century and this girl actually said Hitler.
At the time I was shocked is a gross understatement.
But he explained and it makes so
much sense. Hitler was able to convince people that
the death of 6 million Jews was justified. And then we
see these same people committing the same crimes on
Palestinians today, and thousands are dying in Darfur.
The same shit happens over and over and
overrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr again and yet we haven't changed.
Weapons just change their faces and we keep on coming
up with brand new ways to destroy each other. Another
professor said that the only way ALL human beings will
ever be united was if there was an alien attack from
another planet. Moral of the story? Wasting energy on
how unfair or messed up this world is, solves zilch.
Like you said last time, the best thing we can do is
to work on things we actually have control over and
leave the other stuff to people who are naive enough
to think this thing called human nature is something
that can be tamed, rationalized.
Darlin, ever since you wrote about___,
I've been thinking a lottttttttt about all our
theories revolving around relationships. Mitish, ine
betam kerase realize yarekut neger the idea of a
relationship BORES me to the core. If only I was
'free' like the Moho girls here then I wouldn't feel
so guilty about flings here and there. But I'm not. On
the other hand, mitisha, sewoch 'this is my boyfriend
so and so' bilew sentence sijemiru shimkik new milew.
KELIB. But then of course another problem is that do
we really believe in everlasting love? mitisha, are
we, as humans, even capable of that? ine i don't know
... My Anthro professor said last year to never
confuse longevity with happiness. That is so true eko.
I know the security and companionship that comes along
with it is a necessity gin inja mitisha ... sometimes
living life on the sidelines is pretty amazing. Its
just so damn fascinating ...
Mitish, ene eko i just wonder sometimes how any one
could have that kind of control over us. M for
example I feel is scarred for life because of T.
Mitiye, when I listen to her libe new inkit milew
cause she's reached a conclusion that giving yourself
fully to anyone is not worth cause in her own words
'yane yikebtalu'. And so this new 'relationship' with
TT is doomed from the start because mitisha, she
is forever wary of showing her true feelings. Tadia
ihe min yibalal? ine i don't know what to make of it
... But all I know is mitish there is no sadder site
than to see someone loose their innocence ...
wouwouuuuuuuuuu mitiye lemme not get into that
benatish its just too much.
Darlin onto more practical stuff ... the class I took
at Umass is Economic Development for Post Independent
Africa ... the prof I like and especially cause he
teaches you new theories about the continent. Lelaw,
I'm thinking of taking this class on "The brothers
Karamazov' ... looks like its gonna be interesting
engidih. Beterefe, darlin I miss your emails betam
wouuuy ahunim dimisishim nafkognal endiyawim i'll give
you a call tomorrow. Take good care of yourself, and
especially when you're planning the summer
internships. Minim bihon botaw Africa mehonun atrishi
... guadegna alrekesebignim darlin. Wedishalew.
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 2007
> Darlin, i require your emails just like my cup of> coffee at night, sometimes like the very air which i> breath. Don't deprive me of them - mechem bigebagnem> the issues of being a senior.> > Darlin, There are a million and one things i want> to write to you right now. But i'll struggle to not> say them and just say only one...> > Darlin, For the first time in my life, aygemem,> i'm not scared to wish, to want... i'm sure you> maybe thinking - was she before? Maybe not in the> way you might think... But i had more strength to> deal with disappointments than i did with risking,> then i did with fully wanting something at the risk> of not getting it. Does that make sense? Becha> what i'm thinking now is not that big of a deal, but> i just realized it's something i really want to do.> And at least right now i'm sure of it. Insha Allah,> Insha Allah.>
[ DETAILS OF IDEAS ON HOW TO SPEND THE SUMMER EXCLUDED – EVENT DIDN’T TAKE PLACE AS PLANNED]
[ DETAILS OF IDEAS ON HOW TO SPEND THE SUMMER EXCLUDED – EVENT DIDN’T TAKE PLACE AS PLANNED]
From Feker to Rihana - Nov 2007
mitiye, my love ... kulalite, endet keremshilign?
wouoooooooo endet kitil indalku when i read your
facebook message ... sint juicy tarik indameletegn
iyasebku ... lemanignawim when u do get ur strength
back please indalech kuch argesh lakiat. Ok ... so
where do I start with the updates? ...
darlin ... yesterday I went to this talk at Hampshire
on the topic of 'Can the African State be reformed?'
the speaker was brilliant, a Kenyan by the name Macuo
Matua. He was on the truth commission for a lot of
countries including our very own. After the talk your
uncle even asked him as to how he views the federal
system of Ethiopia and he basically said that they,
ones on the truth commission, were very skeptical even
in the beginning cause he said Meles' intentions were
never transparent. He was very informative gin
mitisha, you know me I always like it when people are
a bit cynical, two comments of his sort of fired up
the audience. For one, he said that Rwanda is bound to
see another genocide in the near future and the only
way to avoid that is to put Hutu's in one country and
Tutsis in the other. Second, he said, and I quote,
"What is Chad? Even the Chadians, if you ask them,
don't know the answer to this." This was actually in
answer to the arbitrary borders set by Europeans which
create problems to this day. Lemanignawim, goodness
mitisha, suffice to say that I was mesmerized. The
confidence with which he spoke, the small spark of
hope he succeeded in lighting, for this troubled,
beautiful continent of ours ...
Incidentally, today is Five College Africa day and
its being held here, at our campus and I'm gonna sneak
out of work to attend some more talks.
Darlin, I'm really confused with my stupid 'thesis'.
Yaltegemere sira defire thesis sil ... Anyways, its
still on the table although I doubt I'll go through
with it ... too many complications bicha esti we'll
see ...
I was reading a book Garcia Marquez, the guy who
wrote 100 years of Solitude? yeah ... bicha mitisha
there's this Indian character and she was a maid in
one of the Europeans house ... later she runs off with
this sketchy guy and her life ultimately ends up in
shambles. Mitisha, woyneeeeeeeee, the way she
described days gone by, beka libe ket new yalew. It
was like ... beka once this day is gone ... nothing
you can do about it. What's worse, you won't even get
to realize it unless its too late ... she was old and
and the woman who was talking to her was saying how,
opposite to everyone in the town who was going through
a difficult time in the past and who was now
prosperous and happy, this woman's happiest days were
those difficult times ... woyne mitisha inja beka more
than anything, never have regrets of wasted days, how
we take this precious time for granted ...
darlin... i really thought about your paper question
last time ... n i honestly couldn't come up with a
GREAT idea gin indene indene, it would be much better
for you to do the paper. If its political economy,
there's always the option of writing on Zimbabwe,
don't know if you've done that before ... or success
stories like Botswana ... I actually recommend that
one strongly, its like an oasis in Sub-Saharan poverty
stricken Africa.
not much else new mitiye. surprisingly ye habesha
fikire gedel gebtoal! there's this habesha kid in my
umass class ina beka last year mainimin bihon indet
izel indeneber iyasebkugn beka berase kelib
tegerimealew. mitiye, my solitude has become my best
friend. wechew gud ... atamgnim mitisha ... yehone
ichi gize bicha nat le masebia yetesetesh yetebalku
yimesil this life for now tesmamtognal ... G, has
involoved herself in yet another unfolding drama, of
course, so its interesting how she goes roundabout
ways to tell me stuff ... yiy ... teyign bakish
mitisha be MOHO tesfa salkort alkerehum ... people
need help, big time! bicha i feel like G's head is
in the right place, lets just hope it stays there ...
my mama has gone off to Bangkok ... they said that
her eyes show signs of glaucoma leza she's there
getting it checked out.
[ PARTS EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY – WAS FUNNY AS HELL THO!!]
mitisha ... i've run out of words, ideas, tarikoch
... too bad you're gonna miss the Nigerian Opera (yes!
i'm not kiddin). We're performin at the end of the
semester ... you'll see pics ofcourse ...
mitiye bey lemme take my leave ...
yours mingizem
wouoooooooo endet kitil indalku when i read your
facebook message ... sint juicy tarik indameletegn
iyasebku ... lemanignawim when u do get ur strength
back please indalech kuch argesh lakiat. Ok ... so
where do I start with the updates? ...
darlin ... yesterday I went to this talk at Hampshire
on the topic of 'Can the African State be reformed?'
the speaker was brilliant, a Kenyan by the name Macuo
Matua. He was on the truth commission for a lot of
countries including our very own. After the talk your
uncle even asked him as to how he views the federal
system of Ethiopia and he basically said that they,
ones on the truth commission, were very skeptical even
in the beginning cause he said Meles' intentions were
never transparent. He was very informative gin
mitisha, you know me I always like it when people are
a bit cynical, two comments of his sort of fired up
the audience. For one, he said that Rwanda is bound to
see another genocide in the near future and the only
way to avoid that is to put Hutu's in one country and
Tutsis in the other. Second, he said, and I quote,
"What is Chad? Even the Chadians, if you ask them,
don't know the answer to this." This was actually in
answer to the arbitrary borders set by Europeans which
create problems to this day. Lemanignawim, goodness
mitisha, suffice to say that I was mesmerized. The
confidence with which he spoke, the small spark of
hope he succeeded in lighting, for this troubled,
beautiful continent of ours ...
Incidentally, today is Five College Africa day and
its being held here, at our campus and I'm gonna sneak
out of work to attend some more talks.
Darlin, I'm really confused with my stupid 'thesis'.
Yaltegemere sira defire thesis sil ... Anyways, its
still on the table although I doubt I'll go through
with it ... too many complications bicha esti we'll
see ...
I was reading a book Garcia Marquez, the guy who
wrote 100 years of Solitude? yeah ... bicha mitisha
there's this Indian character and she was a maid in
one of the Europeans house ... later she runs off with
this sketchy guy and her life ultimately ends up in
shambles. Mitisha, woyneeeeeeeee, the way she
described days gone by, beka libe ket new yalew. It
was like ... beka once this day is gone ... nothing
you can do about it. What's worse, you won't even get
to realize it unless its too late ... she was old and
and the woman who was talking to her was saying how,
opposite to everyone in the town who was going through
a difficult time in the past and who was now
prosperous and happy, this woman's happiest days were
those difficult times ... woyne mitisha inja beka more
than anything, never have regrets of wasted days, how
we take this precious time for granted ...
darlin... i really thought about your paper question
last time ... n i honestly couldn't come up with a
GREAT idea gin indene indene, it would be much better
for you to do the paper. If its political economy,
there's always the option of writing on Zimbabwe,
don't know if you've done that before ... or success
stories like Botswana ... I actually recommend that
one strongly, its like an oasis in Sub-Saharan poverty
stricken Africa.
not much else new mitiye. surprisingly ye habesha
fikire gedel gebtoal! there's this habesha kid in my
umass class ina beka last year mainimin bihon indet
izel indeneber iyasebkugn beka berase kelib
tegerimealew. mitiye, my solitude has become my best
friend. wechew gud ... atamgnim mitisha ... yehone
ichi gize bicha nat le masebia yetesetesh yetebalku
yimesil this life for now tesmamtognal ... G, has
involoved herself in yet another unfolding drama, of
course, so its interesting how she goes roundabout
ways to tell me stuff ... yiy ... teyign bakish
mitisha be MOHO tesfa salkort alkerehum ... people
need help, big time! bicha i feel like G's head is
in the right place, lets just hope it stays there ...
my mama has gone off to Bangkok ... they said that
her eyes show signs of glaucoma leza she's there
getting it checked out.
[ PARTS EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY – WAS FUNNY AS HELL THO!!]
mitisha ... i've run out of words, ideas, tarikoch
... too bad you're gonna miss the Nigerian Opera (yes!
i'm not kiddin). We're performin at the end of the
semester ... you'll see pics ofcourse ...
mitiye bey lemme take my leave ...
yours mingizem
From Feker to Rihana - Nov, 2007
Mitiye, [ FIRST PART EXCLUDED FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]Like you said, sooner or laterwe'll stop seeing the world through the rosy window.One day we'll realize that people are really capableof awful things and that things happen that spin outof our control. What is there to do? There is apurpose for everything bilo malef new ingidih ...ignam 1 ken, and this is inevitable, we'll look backand reminisce on our innocence. There will be brokenhearts, crushed dreams, disappointments, oh and lotsof tears mitiye. Gin indalshiw kemeseley belay minlinameta? nada! wouuuy mitiye ... i really don't evenknow what to say kezih behaula ... my mind just keepson going to that night and ourconversation. mitiye ... i'll write back again when iactually find the words to express what I wanna say ormaybe I've said it all or ... there 's just nothing tobe said. wedishalew, betam.
From Rihana to Feker - Nov 2007
[ MAJORITY OF THE PART EXCLUDED - FOR THE SAKE OF PRIVACY]
> > ... life is a cruel joke, a game mitisha and we're> constantly losing....> I guess you know your strength> at such moments when the whole world starts> crumbling right infront of your eyes. Not a single> day mitisha, did anyone witness tears. > > Yehen sesema men endetesemagn yemenegrebet kale> eskahun altefeterem. It's beyond my ability to say a> fraction of the things that went through me... ones When> one lady gave birth at a young age, me and my mother had a huge> fight cuz, when driving back from the hospital i was> simply unable to control myself and was saying a> bunch of things and i got furious when she> disregarded all that i was saying with a smirk on> her face as if - men aytesh. It was all normal to> her - life rarely delivers. Having shattered dreams> and broken hearts are just norms which apparently> will live to see. " Wiii lej selehonsh new" alechegn.> "MANEW LEJ!!! Ene" alku ... ketel neber yalkut...> wey gud... ewnetem Lej. Menun ayten, menun awken...> legna life is filled with roses and possibilities are> endless... we've guaranteed happiness to ourselves...> it's a given aydel ende.... > Mitiye " lebe ket ale" yebal> yele... weyne yeneko ale! mamen new yakategn. I honeslty don't know> what she went though i honestly don't even wanna> know. All the conversations and all the things we> went through just flashed right in front of my eyes.> All the certainty about what was to come, all that> hope... puff ... gone into to thin air... ande ken> aberesh kuch beye aweraleshalew.,... maybe by then> it will have worn off...haaa... isn't that what> happens ....- shit happens and tomorrow is another> day... the impressions it leaves on us ... maybe> that will be for a life time... men leben> endemisebrew tawkiyalesh lela... if say ppl like> my mom hear this... MENEM AYMESLACHEWMEN -- what> else is new aynet new yemihonew eko... aygermem> becka nuro leb sebera lihon new malet new...> > Weyne Ya Allah, and look at our all our> philosophies and our convictions about our lives...> mitisha hulem metseleye aleben... life's surprises> are endless ... wey gud wehaw ketene eyalen eko new> eyenoren yalenew... our biggest worry being school> ... or things related... what do you do when it's> something you have no control over? Do you just sit> still and live through the pain. Mitiye ene> bebekule, i can't do it. I need to be in control of> my life ... what? u just sit and wait for the moment> to pass, that moment where you would more than be> happy to give up life itself... enes alawkem ....> wiii Ya Allah ... Beka nuro eko men endehone> tawkiyalesh yene wed - TENORENA TEMOTE - yagere sew> belo cheresotal ...> > yebkagn mitisha, let me not wake my deepest fears> .... wedeshalew...
> > ... life is a cruel joke, a game mitisha and we're> constantly losing....> I guess you know your strength> at such moments when the whole world starts> crumbling right infront of your eyes. Not a single> day mitisha, did anyone witness tears. > > Yehen sesema men endetesemagn yemenegrebet kale> eskahun altefeterem. It's beyond my ability to say a> fraction of the things that went through me... ones When> one lady gave birth at a young age, me and my mother had a huge> fight cuz, when driving back from the hospital i was> simply unable to control myself and was saying a> bunch of things and i got furious when she> disregarded all that i was saying with a smirk on> her face as if - men aytesh. It was all normal to> her - life rarely delivers. Having shattered dreams> and broken hearts are just norms which apparently> will live to see. " Wiii lej selehonsh new" alechegn.> "MANEW LEJ!!! Ene" alku ... ketel neber yalkut...> wey gud... ewnetem Lej. Menun ayten, menun awken...> legna life is filled with roses and possibilities are> endless... we've guaranteed happiness to ourselves...> it's a given aydel ende.... > Mitiye " lebe ket ale" yebal> yele... weyne yeneko ale! mamen new yakategn. I honeslty don't know> what she went though i honestly don't even wanna> know. All the conversations and all the things we> went through just flashed right in front of my eyes.> All the certainty about what was to come, all that> hope... puff ... gone into to thin air... ande ken> aberesh kuch beye aweraleshalew.,... maybe by then> it will have worn off...haaa... isn't that what> happens ....- shit happens and tomorrow is another> day... the impressions it leaves on us ... maybe> that will be for a life time... men leben> endemisebrew tawkiyalesh lela... if say ppl like> my mom hear this... MENEM AYMESLACHEWMEN -- what> else is new aynet new yemihonew eko... aygermem> becka nuro leb sebera lihon new malet new...> > Weyne Ya Allah, and look at our all our> philosophies and our convictions about our lives...> mitisha hulem metseleye aleben... life's surprises> are endless ... wey gud wehaw ketene eyalen eko new> eyenoren yalenew... our biggest worry being school> ... or things related... what do you do when it's> something you have no control over? Do you just sit> still and live through the pain. Mitiye ene> bebekule, i can't do it. I need to be in control of> my life ... what? u just sit and wait for the moment> to pass, that moment where you would more than be> happy to give up life itself... enes alawkem ....> wiii Ya Allah ... Beka nuro eko men endehone> tawkiyalesh yene wed - TENORENA TEMOTE - yagere sew> belo cheresotal ...> > yebkagn mitisha, let me not wake my deepest fears> .... wedeshalew...
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